I don't recommend to most people to get drunk at home alone...however it's very theraputic for me, so that is what I and 2 bottles of Arbor Mist did last night.
In my drunkin state, I found myself:
*ending a friendship that I realized is a bit too one sided
*delving into a pointless rant about the porn biz laced with tales of childhood traumas and issues with my boyfriend over the phone
I came to realize this morning that the only adult video material that I will be "starring" in from now on will be my live MonicaF.com webcam shows and material/content for my own websites and online stores - I'm ready to develop other areas of my life now and create a career for myself that has nothing to do with me being in front of the camera in a sexual way. I had fun for a while, but now it's time to move on.
On a whole I'm very disappointed in the adult industry and in the people who primarily "run it". There are many areas of the industry that need to be fixed and many people who need to be "called out" so once www.gettingintoporn.com is launched, that will be my ongoing "rant" outlet about the porn biz.
Actually I have a good feeling that gettingintoporn.com will wind up helping a lot of young women (and maybe men too) who are in the biz or thinking about getting into the biz. I will probably wind up pissing off a lot of people, but oh well - people should think before they act because no one gets away with being an asshole undercover forever.
The only other thing I'll say in this blog about the porn biz is that it is a "system" - a system that once worked and was nearly unbeatable, but now is flawed and BEATABLE system due to the injection of the internet into the porn equation.
Initially I was going to charge people for the information I've compiled about what to expect in and how to make money in, gain "fame" in and beat this porn system BUT considering how pissed off I am about how I'm seeing girl after girl treated by this biz, I'll be offering the info for FREE - when it comes to wanting to help people I'm a softy and I don't believe in profiting off revealing the truth.
On a happier note, I'm glad it's the weekend. Today my dog gets a bath, my laundry gets a washing, and later tonight I'll be going out :)