Finally getting back on track/schedule in relation to my personal and business projects - I really wish there were 3 of me rather than just 1 - I'd get so much more done.
Last night was another broadcast of my show RED T-Back (real exotic dancers talk back) - check out the video - next week hopefully I'll have a guest :)

Today was one of my most productive days ever. I recently connected via Myspace with a really intelligent and artistic guy by the name of Kamary who's developed a great concept for an online (and potential foreign market show) calld "The X-Profiles" - I get to contribute as a co-host and I'm very excited. Today we ran through all the technnical aspects of the show to get ready for the final result/recordings - hard work but worth it!

One of the current sponsors for the show is an energy drink company - You gotta check out their commercial and buy it when it's on the shelves peeps.

The cool thing about being me is that I never know WHAT will happen day to day - I love that. In a sense I know losely what I need to acomplish each day but the universe seems to like to throw all kinds of odds and ends at me - I guess mostly because I can take it.
This week should be INCREDIBLY productive and fun - tomorrow I have a date with a really interesting person. Wednesday I'll be brainstorming and rehersing for the first installment of an online series I'll be co-hosting, and then I should be working solidly through to the weekend on both my website and material for another site.
Busy busy busy bee = me
I'm 29 but I love that new teen pop artist Miley Cyrus - mainly because she has the dual identity thing like I do - and her music is pretty cool. I'd love to get into the music world a bit before I'm done being in front of the camera.
Tonight I did my "anti-camgirl" show on the camz network - I love those session - the "Anti-Camgirl" show along with "Red T-back" really are my media "babies" . The best part about doing the shows...the fan mail - I get some really great feedback from the viewers and listeners - and that's what makes it all worth while.
Below is my theme song for the evening:

I'm over the guy who I wrote about in my most recent posts - but I do miss talking to him. My ever present life lesson is that you can't change people or situations - you either are compatable in all areas, or you accept and adapt or you accept and move forward or you don't accept and just walk away.
I'm in love with being in love, and I live to find the love so I need to find someone who thinks along the same lines I do - I really believe that the meaning of life is finding and maintaining love in your romantic world, family world and inner personal world.

It's the weekend, which is a relaxing time for most, but for me it's a busy busy time. For those of you who've missed seeing me on cam, nows the time to catch me.
Today I spent some time with my mom - there's nothing like going home, even if you don't live there anymore. Somehow no sofa in the world is as soft as your mom's, and no place in the world smells as good as your mom's kitchen, even if nothing's simmering on the stove.
Later tonight I think I'll shoot another pictorial for my monicaf.com website.
This Wednesday will be exciting - I'll be shooting a test run of an online talkshow I was asked to co-host which has the potential of being picked up to tv via foreign markets - I love cutting edge media projects.
Music really does help to heal the soul - especially when it comes to getting over romantic intrests...the song below helped me start the "bounce-back process" - it's one of my favorite songs in general and the lyrics have helped me time and time again - I already feel better :)

Ok, I'm officially a "hot and on the go fetish photographer & videographer" :) - hehe. The past few days I worked with model, personality and awsome friend Amazon Amanda to develop content for her upcoming website. I think I did more in 2 days than an entire production team typically does in a week. I'm tired but feel incredibly energized because I love being productive. Check out some of these results from the shoot later on (a group cast/crew photo is currently postedof course).

Aside from just shooting content, while out of town on this assignment, I also had the chance to meet some really cool people and bond a bit more with some current aquaintances. Some of the people I met really let me vent on some current issues in my life and it was much appreciated. I really had a chance to clear my head. It's always good to hear a fresh perspective from someone that doesn't know you.

Oh last but not least I realized that I forgot that I really have a thing for country music. I'll be listening to some while doing cam shows 2nite.

Recently I let someone who had the potential of being really special to me into my life - but once again it didn't work out due to my hypersensitivity and need for validation - and I wound up a bit hurt. Maybe I'll go a bit more in depth about this but not too deep.....though this dude basicly has his phone tethered to the palm of his hand at all times, he couldn't "find the time" to call when he said he would. Typical "girl gripe" sure, but I'm past the games at this point in my life. If I give in one area, I expect to get in another area. Maybe I should just be a gold digger and forget about receiving from a man what's the most valuable thing of all - his time.

I'm not going to kick myself over this dude though...Why? Well, because my quirks and "off" tendancies are what make me the cool, psychotic and ecentric chick that I am. Also I know that sometime and someplace I'll come across someone who's the perfect compliment to my oddities and requirements - someone who'll maintain the level of communication and consideration that I require

Later on I'll post a little video montage of my roadtrip up to Orlando (the location of the shoot) - it'll give u a real laugh if you're a frequent reader of this blog.

The next couple days I'll be out of town on a "fetish photography assignment". Yeah :) I'm pretty excited about it, but I know it will be a TON of work - I'm ready though.

In my last posting I mentioned maybe going to church again to try to meet someone - well I still might start attending church again, just because it's something I'd like to do, but not to meet anyone...Why? Well recently someone pretty special entered my life, and though initially I made the assumption that this person didn't want a "relationship", it looks as though I might have been wrong. It's really good to be wrong sometimes :)

Only about 4 months untill my lease is up. I am SOOOOOOOOO happy - I will be moving to the beach this time around.

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Well today I felt a little down, but whenever I feel sad, there's one place I know to go that could make even the most depressed person in the world feel happy and hopefull - IKEA.
Today I decided to make an IKEA day - I ran my morning errands and then headed out to the store at around 12pm. I've needed a dining table for a pretty long time, so I decided to go ahead and pick one up - IKEA has mix and match table tops and legs which I think is pretty cool so I went with a dark brown top and silver kind of "eclectic" looking legs.
I also picked up a LACK coffee table which I'm using as my TV stand. I wanted to get chairs for the dining table too but they didn't have the ones I thought I wanted in stock. I'm glad though because upon getting home I realized the ones I was thinking of getting wouldn't have looked right anyways.
I want to implement more green into my decor so I also picked up a green area rug. Along with a few other various things like dishes, a chair for my computer desk and some other knick knacks I only wound up spending a little over $200! You can only do that at IKEA.
Normally if I'm shopping alone I don't stop to eat, because I hate eating alone, but today I did, mostly cause it's hard to pass up the IKEA restaurant, but I actually felt ok about it.
Sometime being single I feel really lonely. Quick fixes like booty calls are ok to ease that loneliness at times, but usually that isn't the best thing since most booty call type men are asses.
After I'm done re-arranging my apartment tonight I'll take a few pics and post them.

Well I had a GREAT birthday. This new year and age (29) will ROCK!

Well now that the holidays and birthday are out of the way, it's time to get back to serious work. There are a few technical things I need to do with my business and my websites need major updating (as usual).

I'm also in the process of giving my apartment a bit of an over-haul - I'm allowing myself not to feel guilty about a few little "splurges" :)

Today I put together a "behind the scenes" video of my most recent photo pictorial "Plastic" - to those of u who don't think I do all my own shit - check this out chumps...

Well, tomorrow I am 29. I guess that's kind of cool. Yesterday I got to play "babysitter" for my nephew, that was SOOOOO much fun, but a lot of work too. In a way I suppose it was a part of my b-day present this year.
After going out last night, my right rear tire exploded on the road. ARG! Yet another damn expense. At least I was close to home when it happened - would have been worse if it had happened on an interstate or something.
Another goal I'm going to have for the year is going to be to learn how to change a tire. That's something I really need to learn how to do because guy friends who "claim" to be depenedable, usually are not.

Well it's a new year (FINALLY) and I'm feeling SOOOOO psyched, energetic and purpose driven. I have a very optimistic & positive outlook for the year and I'm going to try my best to achieve many of my personal and professional goals.
One of my main goals this year is to re-open my photography studio. However after speaking with a good friend about that posibility, I've realized that opening more of a "media" studio is a better bet - a studio where I can create and produce not just still photography but video and graphics and multimedia content.
Another one of my goals is to get completely out of debt and I'm on my way to completing that goal very soon.
I also want to re-enroll in school - I think online classes to start will be my best bet.
Another one of my goals is to further my RED T-Back project ( www.RedTback.com ) - I will be taking the show from audio only to video this month - that should be exciting. I video taped the last broadcast.




ONe of my personal development goals this year (and the last goal I'll write about tonight) is to make an active effort to help people I'm close to when I know they're in trouble. I know that I can't control anyone and believe me, I don't want to, but I do think that God put me on earth to do a bit more than just help myself.

Well it's the last day of 2007. Wow, what a roller coaster of a year it's been. I'll tell you this though, my year has ended on a big fat positive rather than a negative so I'm psyched about 2008.
My New Year's Eve plans came together afterall. I know where I'll be and who I'll be hanging with AND I know what I'll be wearing (my outfit is super cute) - so I'm glad. I'll be bringing in the year sexy, sassy, and single - and I see that as a good thing.
2007 enabled me to get all the negative and toxic people out of my life, but it also opened some doors to let some really great new positive people in. I was able to mend some torn relationships with my family this year as well, which was more important than anything.
This year I will be running on fast forward all the way through. Lots and lots to do.

Well I'm all set for New Years Eve. I still don't have definite plans but I DO have a kick ass outfit and a little cash to buy myself some drinks. That's all you really need. I was hoping to have a date, but anyone I was thinking of asking either is out of town (valid excuse), or already has plans (not a valid excuse as they COULD include me) or are broke (not a valid excuse because it shows total irresponsiblity).
The assholes who already have plans or are broke had better not bother me for the rest of the year - you gotta give to get and I'm not about chumps in '08 at all.

I will be working most of this weekend, but I might venture out either tonight or tomorrow just to socialize, listen to some music and get a few drinks. We'll see. I finally cleaned my car, hopefully in '08 I can get a convertible. :)

I'm looking forward to New Year's Eve - I don't know exactly what I'll be doing that night or where I'll be going, but I have an idea, and I am sure I'll have a great time. So far I have 3 friends to party with, so that's all that really matters anyways.
I've been checking out the prices of most of the local New Years Eve events and it's fucking out of control. I don't think I can afford to hit a club this year. Hell, I want a nice outfit/dress to wear and if I have to buy that, there's no way I can blow $200 on a party/club entry. People are on crack.
That reminds me, this weekend I'll hit the dreaded mall to try to find one. I want something very sparkly.

Merry Christmas everyone! Check out the video below (even though I've posted it before) in honor of the holiday and what it's all really about.

It's Christmas Eve folks and believe it or not, I'm actually feeling a little "Merry". I managed to get all my shopping and shipping done on time, so I can just relax - well actually I never relax, as usual I'm working.
Though I don't want to because of a few issues and circumstances, I'm going to spend part of X-mas eve and X-mas with my family because I feel in my heart it's the "right thing" to do. It's funny how you never would imagine as a child how much your relationships with various family members can change so much - both for the better and for the worse but I guess that's just a part of life.
In other news my computer network is working BEAUTIFULLY - since I've up an independent video editing system I've been so productive and I think it will really reflect through all the additions to my websites over the next week.
Between my site updates and continued work on a few other projects, I'm going to roll into 2008 blazing, so don't stick aorund if you can't handle the heat :)

I finished all my Christmas shopping today and walked away from the experience with a new outlook on my country. I've come to realize, that electing another President, Vice President, or even continuing with our form of government overall is just yet another mistake in America's current and seemingly endless disfunctional cycle. Instead, IKEA needs to rise to power and take over America's government.
Thank God for IKEA. IKEA saved me this Christmas. IKEA truly is heaven on earth. Bright, clean, orderly, products that are simple and straight forward though designed to be rearrangable and even altered to your own specifications, friendly employees, prices I can afford, a do-it yourself enviroment....(I could go on and on).
Some conspiracy peeps say IKEA is our governament's way to introduce Americans to a more communist type system. Well if that's the case, then just call me the Hitler of furniture and other household items.
You just CAN'T BEAT IKEA. Period. If I ever have a child, I might name it IKEA (or maybe Malm). That is how impressed I cam with that company. Yes, I am a nerd.
I'll tell you what though - Sawgrass Mall can go straight to hell...and then a few levels below that as well. Sawgrass Mall is actually the current state of America. Way too big, way to many people who don't speak english, way to much useless and overpriced poor quality crap and junk and a ton of scam artists. I should have known better than to even ATTEMPT that mall but the Christmas Shopping Fever got the best of me. I'll tell u what though, I couldn't deal with that mall for any longer than an hour. Ye
I'm a green little Grinch this Christmas. I don't want to even deal with the damn holiday this year - I just want this year to be OVER because I'm ready to move on to '08.

Well, only a few days till Christmas and I still haven't done any shopping for my family or friends - just great... and I really can't handle the thought of hitting a shopping center/mall around this time of year - I live with a high level of anxiety so I do my best to avoid situations that may set me off.
Since almost everywhere is going to be busy since we're only a few days away from Chrstimas I'm going to hit probably the ONLY store that I can deal with - IKEA, so that where I will be early afternoon later today. I'm not going to totally stress, I'm just going to buy what I afford this year for close family and friends and let that be it.
I'm not making any ''New Year's" resolutions, I'm just staying on the same track I'm currently on - my main priorities as of current are to move into a nicer place, get a nicer car, open my photography studio (hopefully) , improve my wardrobe and do some traveling.

I haven't posted in a while, but mainly because I have been VERY BUSY - which is great! Along with being busy though, I'm taking more time to relax and really enjoy my life - especially over now since the holidays are coming and most likely I'll be spending it solo.
I'll be uploading my photo set next week so check it out! Also this weekend hopefully I'll get some video work done too.

Sometimes it's not until you've had a great steak from Albertson's cooked on your little George Foreman Grill, a bottle and a half of Hornsby's Amber draft, and a Marlboro Light, while watching an episode of Sex in the City while sitting on your patio that you realize that being single at 28, almost 29 really ain’t to shabby.
I think part of my problem is that sometimes I'm so consumed with finding "the one" that I don't take time to "smell the roses" and realize that my life overall is pretty damn good.
Where else in the world can I enjoy a nice winters evening on the weekend on my patio in relative summer/spring conditions while listening to some mellow
spanish music wafting on the evening breeze from my latin american neighbors apartment one over and one up from mine.
Where else in the world could I "go to work" from my bedroom at home in my lingerie and make an ok living?
Maybe somewhere, but I don't know where.
I love steak. Usually steak and shrimp, especially at a nice restaurant, but the beauty of grocery stores and their abundance of spices, sauces, and other edible supplies is that the average girl can at least attempt to do it herself. I’m thinking about taking some cooking classes for the hell of it to become a better chef. Dating a chef really isn’t a good solution because you can become dependant upon them cooking for you, and if you grow to hate who you’re dating to contemplate whether or not to break up because of the food. I think that mere situation is why many people stay together…
One thing about being single, is that you really learn how to crack yourself up (ya start to make yourself laugh).
I’m not sure I’m really even single since I have pets. My dog is great, totally my buddy and a diversion from taking myself too seriously, but the real roommate around here is my bird. This bird I have is 14 years old. Amazing. My bird has seen a lot. Luckily he can’t talk, if he could I don’t think I’d want to know what he has to say…
Last night I and my friend Amanda had a really cool "im-promptu" evening in downtown Fort Lauderdale. Just 2 friends, checking out the scene, having some drinks, flirting with some guys and then parting ways. Very cool if I say so myself.
I don't know what I'm doing for the Christmas holiday yet. As of current I don't have anything planned. A part of me wants to spend it with my family but I truly don't know if I'm ready to be the "single odd one out" in my age range amongst my family. A part of me wants to try to do a "single girls" holiday somewhere remote and exciting from my norm. Like Las Vegas....
We'll see what happens, maybe I'll just volunteer somewhere.
Monday my new computer which I will use only for video editing arrives.
I’m happy about that.