Sometimes you really just do things in life for the money. I hate being in that "mode" of thinking, but when you're single and can only depend really on yourself, sometimes being in that mode of thinking has strictly to do with self preservation and overall survival.
I'm really enjoying playing my new guitar - it's very relaxing and it forces your mind to work in a different way.

I'm an official "Californian" now - I've survived my first "earthquake. Yep - a 5'8" hit the LA area yesterday - luckily I didn't feel much of anything. Living in Hollywood is crazy enough - last thing I need is for the ground to open up and swallow me :) Though the event was rather "uneventful" for me, it did prompt me to get my "earthquake kit" together in case something crazy DOES happen (bottled water, un-perishable food, flashlight, etc).
One of the best things that I've done for myself since moving here has been to join a gym and hire a personal trainer. I see SUCH A FUCKING DIFFERENCE in my body - it's incredible. Everyone should hire a trainer at some point in their life (unless they're a trainer themselves), because they really teach you how to work out properly for your body type. Today I had the chance to learn a little MMA - if someone messes with me now they better watch out :)
My apartment is finally starting to feel like "home" and it's nice.Funny how it can really take a few weeks to get "settled" into a new enviroment.
Well I'm back to doing my reg cam shows, and this weekend will probably be doing some video editing in a major way. Next week I'll start up RED T-Back again - hopefully with some cool guests.
Still waiting on my new business cards that I ordered to arrive - I'd better all the company... I really want to do a lot more web design and photography while I'm living out here. I'm in the process of "pimpin out" a friend of mine's page in exchange for guitar lessons. That's been fun.

Well, I googled my guise "Monica Foster" recently and found something that initially made me angry, later sad, but now just disappointed that the world is still full of people who think as the assholes who post on this forum do:

http://www.asiafinest.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=149068&st=160

This discussion's topic is about "black women in the media who are deemed as cute" by these member's of "Asia's Finest" (somehow I doubt most of these members of the forum are even asian).

If you read that page, you'll find where one forum member, linked to one of my photos and said he thought I was cute. Well keep reading because apparently not only did others disagree with him but they WENT on to say that I am "ape like" and "cross eyed" and "look like a transsexual".

"cross eyed" - I'll let that one go because sometimes my focus is a little off center and having very almond shaped eyes can give this illusion too (You'd think that "asia's finest" would know this being that MANY asian people at first glance in photos look crosseyed even when they are not).

"ape like" - Fuck you Asia's Finest forum posters. I do not look anything like an ape. I'd like to see what you jerk offs look like.

"transsexual" - well that's just stupid. If you want to see whether I'm a real woman or not just check out one of my porn videos.

This forum just goes to show WHY the world is difficult for black women in ANY industry - because you have people running around who think of black women in such negative terms on a consistant basis. Sick.

Ok, I have a new favorite porn studio - Naughty America. I think Naughty America will wind up being the Playboy Enterprise for the new generation of porn viewers. Yes, they plug and promote themselves, but they ALSO plug and promote the external projects of the women they feature. Love it.

Check out this article that their writers over on thenaughtyamerican.com wrote on me after my live webcam show with their studio for the site live.naughtyamerica.com:

http://www.thenaughtyamerican.com/index.php/articles/art_page/2266/ex_stripper_gives_back_to_the_community

Very well written article. My only criticism is that they didn't put an actual link to www.REDTback.com but oh well - at least there's a link to my official site www.monicaf.com :)

Moving to California has been full of pros and cons. The pros being a more active lifestyle (I walk more places, eat healthier, joined a gym), have met some really cool creative people and have much more work opportunity especially when it comes to freelance photography. The cons however are starting to take their toll - it's very expensive to live here and lots of NON-creative leacherous people are out to take advantage of you at EVERY FUCKING TURN.
I really wanted to try to do well, at least for a while, in the adult video world. However today was the last straw when it comes to the agency I switched too. Is it really so hard to give your client all the details of a shoot that you're sending them to? Apparently it is which is why I've lost faith in allowing other people to have a part in helping to develop ANYTHING I try to do in life professionally.
Today I did a live webcam show with a company called Naughty Amercia. The pay sucked BUT at least I got to plug my website and self promote which is something that you really can't put a price on. The people who I worked with were really cool and the atmosphere was chill. I'd like to work with them again in one of their series, but in all honesty, I don't think I have the right "look" for them.
Come to think of it, I don't seem to have the right "look" for anyone on camera wise. It's kind of depressing but being that I'm almost 30 years old now, I really don't care anymore which is why I'm going to make sure my photography business really pans out by the end of this year, even if it kills me.
Fucking stress, this is why I can't quit smoking.

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Almost done getting everything in my apartment as it should be before I really go full force with my webcam shows. I made my final trip to IKEA for quite a while today to pick up a chest of drawers of which I'm about to assemble after I'm done with this blog.
One of my MonicaF.com members emailed me today about another porn DVD I'm featured in: "Black Bottom Girls 5" - by Vouyer Media. I look great in the preview - which can be seen here: http://press.vouyermedia.com - however I'm not very excited about this particular DVD release and I'm very disappointed in this studio.
Why? Well prior to me shooting my scene in this video with Jack Napier, both I AND my agents were told that if I did the scene I would be on the BOXCOVER. Obviously I am not. In fact, the boxcover shoot never happened - it was canceled not once but TWICE, and on top of that I was never given a "kill fee" for the canceled shoots. My agency didn't even KNOW the shoot was canceled the second time because the studio head canceled it via TEXT MESSAGE to my CELL PHONE. Oh yes - oh so professional...
I find this business practice of making a false promise to a performer and her agency in order to get a performer to do a scene VERY un-ethical (even though it is in "porn world") and it surprises me that the head of Vouyer Media, an ex-performer himself, would see this as an "OK" thing to do to a current performer. Turns out it's not the first time this particular studio head has done this either, as I've heard through word of mouth that he used this same ploy to get another performer (who shall remain nameless) to do her first anal scene with his studio.
This situation COULD still be rectified by this studio, and I hope it will be. Next time I talk to my agency I think I'll ask about it.
In other news, I joined a gym today! I'll be living here in Cali for at least a year so I might as well get in the best shape of my life. I mainly just want to tone up and gain some stamina.
I still can't get over all of these feminine yet straight Los Angeles men - so until I can wrap my mind around it (and I doubt I'll ever be able to) I've come up with a new way to classify them: I see this group of men as a "3rd sex" and I dub them "Menwem".

My definition of a Menwem: An incredibly attractive "model-esqe" type of man who is not homosexual, yet embodies many "feminine" qualities. A step beyond the typical metrosexual. They occasionally will date women, however women should beware of the Menwem as they will often project unwarranted and unprovoked hostility toward women as they see women as a form of "competition" and often harbor much jealousy towards the pervieved "advantages" in life women have which the Menwem envy.
Most Menwem are essentially "Man-Children" and are often confirmed lifelong bachelors - though they do not engage in homosexual activity they prefer the company of other Menwem to women which is why you will see most Menwem running in packs. Menwem are found in vast numbers in Hollywood, Ca and tend to gravitate towards the arts and entertainment industries. Though the Menwem do find strength in "numbers" within these packs they are easy to break down and defeat if attacked individually.

:) Yes, my mind is warped.

Well my move to Los Angeles is officially complete. My car was delivered yesterday along with the rest of my packed up belongings, so tonight will be spent getting everything unpacked and the rest of my furniture assembled.
Today I contacted Chris Connor, the host of LAST CALL on dqrm today to try to get on the show to give their audience an update as to how I've switched agencies over to Type9models along with some other interesting happenings since deciding to move to Los Angeles. Hopefully he'll have me on soon.
I decided to google my alter-ego "Monica Foster" today and found that my adult dvd's now come up in the search. That's a good thing because having the "porn star" status associated with Monica Foster SHOULD drive more traffic to my official website and cam shows :)
Oh, I almost forgot to add that I shot another AV scene over the weekend - for West Coast Productions. The name of the series the scene will be in is "Office Freaks 3". The director, Bishop, was great on this shoot - I actually had a good amount of loosely dialog for once(which was a little nerve-racking but I got through it). I don't plan on doing many more AV scenes, just a few select projects for studios with good attitudes who actually make good porn.
I really liked working with West Coast from the start a few months ago when I shot for "Booty Talk". Though they produce "black porn", the scenes for the DVD's of theirs I've shot have not been degrading black porn - if anything it's been fairly "high end" - now that's progressive.
One thing I've noticed about Los Angeles, is that there are a hell of a lot of "pretty" yet supposedly straight men. This bothers me a bit. Since when did men start to dote on and groom themselves so much? I've never seen so many men with manicures and incredibly gelled up hair in my life. I think there's a higher percentage of men here in the general populace of LA dolled up than women. It's strange.
I've heard that the the west coast is where many social trends start. I hope this "prettier than the women" trend going on here with men isn't one of those trends. What's even more disturbing is that the prissiness in many "straight" men here doesn't end on the outside...lots of internal "bitchiness" is present within males here too, maybe because many of these pretty boys are failed entertainers and their bitter. Who knows. Regardless, butch it up boys - quick.

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