Saturday, August 30, 2014

Re-examining the darkness from the light

I've made it known on my twitter that over the next few days, I will be re-examining and working through (in part publicly) my thoughts and feelings in regards to a man I knew while I was active in the pornographic industry. I've had several other relationships with men throughout my life that I have been able to properly move forward from, however, this particular man is someone I've never been able to completely get out of my system (and I'm hoping to completely figure out why).

In the past, when I've mentioned this man, certain people (who I label as my stalkers) have bullied me into silence about him.  I'm not allowing that to happen anymore, because there's something about that man and that time of my life that I know in my core needs to be addressed and resolved.

As of tonight, I attribute my lack of ability to clear this man from my thoughts being due to some issues and events surrounding the relationship that were extraordinarily abnormal on a multitude of levels.  As I've stated in my blog several times in the past, one of the most difficult things one must do in life, is to look at THEMSELVES and at their PAST honestly.  I've reached a point in my self imposed healing process to where I feel brave enough to really THINK about and EVALUATE some of the memories in regards to the man I'm referring to.  I'm hoping God will provide me with some answers as well.

I will share a lot about whatever I realize, but I doubt I will share everything.  Research "trauma-bonding" - here's a link to get your started:

Abuse isn't always physical or "in your face" psychological.  I've come to understand that my "scars" from abuse have manifested in my actions and choices.  I don't believe abusers always realize that they abuse.  Other times people who are on the receiving end of abuse don't realize that they're being abused.  I feel that there are instances to where people have been in unhealthy and/or dysfunctional relationships (or maybe just ways of living) for so long that they have no concept of what "normal" or "healthy" really is - so they become desensitized.  I think it's even possible for people to habitually and KNOWINGLY REJECT a healthy or normal relationship for a dysfunctional one, because the dysfunction FEELS more FAMILIAR than anything else (I believe, in part, what's happened to me).

I hate already being 35 years old and just now identifying some of these issues, but I subscribe to the philosophy of "better late than never".  I'm glad I don't have any children at this time, and I hope I get through this process relatively quickly.  I believe I've reached my final step in closing the book on a phase of my life I began in early 2008.

I know my sharing my thoughts as I do is strange to certain people in my life (or who I may never have met).  I do it because I don't believe that I have been (or will be) the only woman in the world to have dealt with some of the situations, people and events which I have.  I find it comforting to think that my blogs just might give someone else out there a reference point as to where they are on the map of life.

Yes, my blogs are selfless - yet selfish. Funny how that is...isn't it.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

I am angry.

In this blog, I will admit that I am VERY ANGRY.  I'm angry because on many levels I've been victimized, but I'm more angry that I haven't fought back as hard as I should have for many years to regain my personal power.  Tonight I went on a "twitter rant" and I believe it was my first solid step in releasing the anger I've been carrying due to many things I've noticed within the world that I've felt the need to restrain myself from sharing.

My views and observations are simply that of what I've experienced in my 35 years on this planet.  I don't expect everyone (or anyone for that matter) to agree with me.  I don't need anyone to.  I don't expect a shred of support. I understand completely how I will be labeled as prejudice, intolerant, unforgiving, hateful, etc... and I'M FINE WITH IT.

I see how in many instances it's better to keep your opinions to yourself - especially if you want to be monetarily "successful" and "fit in" in this world.  I just wasn't created to be that way and I will not apologize for it.

I don't have an issue with taking responsibility for or being punished for anything I've genuinely done that's been wrong and without just cause because I'm not the type of person to do anything wrong without just cause.  It's not in my nature.  HOWEVER I HAVE A MAJOR PROBLEM WITH BEING TOLD THAT I AM WRONG ABOUT ISSUES, EVENTS & INDIVIDUALS THAT I KNOW I AM CORRECT ABOUT.

When I don't understand something, I look for an answer and I ASK for an answer.  I have ALWAYS questioned things that I don't understand which is what's led me to become an independent researcher on a variety of issues.  It's the pursuit of the truth that turns me on more so than anything in this world. I LOVE learning systems and how things work - that's how I was created to be.

Within the United States of America (and maybe the world as a whole), people are being encouraged at an ever increasing rate NOT to question how things work.  I feel that people in general are being told to just sit down, shut up and be accepting of whatever is given to us by whoever is in power.

I'm not OK with that.  I don't feel God designed me and sent Jesus Christ to die for me to tolerate such an attitude.

I don't expect many people to relate to how I think, or be as I am - it's far easier not to. When it comes down to it, I'd rather be cast out from much of society and viewed as "a problem", than to not have shared my perspective or opinion.  

Maybe rather than saying to yourself "oh, she's just a typical ANGRY BLACK WOMAN" - maybe you should question, "How did the stereotype of ANGRY BLACK WOMEN ever come to be?  What and who exactly prompted certain Black women to BECOME so angry?"  

I'd say that this blog which goes back to 2007 will tell you the least in part.

Wednesday, August 06, 2014

Do the Right Thing - an update on the defamation / libel lawsuit filed against me.

do the right thing 02In regards to the lawsuit I'm currently contending with, in late July I took note of how the opposing counsel appeared to be baiting me (via the location of a required Early Court Conference) into violating the terms of a Protection Order requested by the opposing party.

The Protection Order was issued through the Nevada courts against me by default (I was unable to attend the hearing), and the order request was based solely on non-direct Tweets & a piece of artistic parody (a First Amendment issue).

In response, I filed an Early Court Conference Report outlining the situation.  A few days later, the opposing counsel AGAIN has attempted to coerce me into violating the CLEARLY STATED TERMS of the Protection Order - a violation which would result in my being charged with a FELONY (which would result in my imprisonment from one to twenty years).

Objection To Notice of Early Case Conference 

Objection To Notice of Early Case Conference exhibit A

Objection To Notice of Early Case Conference exhibits B - J

Objection To Notice of Early Case Conference exhibit F

Download the following court documents above (in their entirety) to learn about the situation.

This is a perfect example as to how individuals are routinely silenced at all costs (even by "legitimate" attorneys) when they speak out in regards to situations such as organized crime & civil rights in our society (in my particular situation, I've been in activist in regards to informing the public and individuals in government positions about why certain legislation should be enforced and passed to protect the health and safety of adult film performers).

The Protection Order which was issued to me clearly states:

“You are prohibited, either directly or through an agent, from contacting, intimidating, using, attempting to use, or threatening the use of physical force or otherwise interfering in any way with Applicant [redacted] and/or the following persons: [redacted], [redacted], [redacted] including, but not limited to, in person, by telephone, through the mail, through electronic mail (e-mail), text messaging, facsimile, or through another person”.

It is NOT good enough (or legally binding) for the opposing counsel to simply state that they would not consider my attendance or communication with them as a breech of the Protection Order terms.  The opposing counsel DOES NOT have such authority.  ONLY A JUDGE of the NEVADA, UNITED STATES OF AMERICA COURT system has the authority to define (and change) the terms of the Protection Order issued against me (if they determine they should do so).

As of current, the Protection Order's terms completely prevent me from participating in the Civil Court Judicial process - therefor through legal means, I am experiencing an Obstruction of Justice. do the right thing 

Below you can see exactly who in (and attached) to the Los Angeles, California pornographic industry had interest in coercing me into being charged with a felony: porn director Jeff Mullen aka Will Ryder, porn camera man Matthew Holder and porn disinformation figure Ari Bass aka Michael Whiteacre.

Jeff Mullen aka Will Ryder, Matthew Holder, Ari Bass aka Michael Whiteacre 

If you are an adult film industry performer - I strongly encourage you to avoid Jeff Mullen and Matthew Holder.  At one point in time I made the mistake of viewing both men as individuals who were decent human beings who I could trust.  Matthew Holder in particular... at one point in time I believed I loved him very much.      

Tuesday, August 05, 2014

Alexandra Mayers fka Monica Foster interviews Olympic silver medalist Josh Mance

Alexandra Mayers interviews Olympic Athlete Josh Mance about TMZ, Skin Diamond, Racism & more!
Alexandra Mayers fka Monica Foster interviews Olympic silver medalist Josh Mance about his recent encounter with media gossip outlet TMZ, pornstar Skin Diamond, a situation involving racism he experienced on his 21st birthday that was heavily covered by mainstream news, his life as an Olympic athlete and his "fetish" for older women.

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Is Porn industry attorney Ronald D. Green attempting to frame Alexandra Mayers fka Monica Foster as a stalker? The evidence.

***UPDATE: The stalkers Alexandra Mayers named in this legal issue obtained the Early Court Conference Report Alexandra filed in regards to this issue and posted it on the porn news gossip blog they operate - but not in it's entirety or with truthful commentary. Download the complete papers & the exhibits here.

As many who follow the pornographic industry news know, Alexandra Mayers fka Monica Foster is currently being sued by a client represented by pornographic industry attorney Ronald D. Green of Randazza Legal Group in Las Vegas, Nevada.  The client is the wife of Ronald D. Green's business partner and employer.

Since Ronald D. Green and his client filed the lawsuit in April of 2014  (which they unsuccessfully attempted to settle out of court a few days later), it appears Green has been abusing the legal system to fight Alexandra Mayers' constitutional rights to represent herself and defend herself in court. Due to the financial difficulty Alexandra Mayers is currently facing, to defend herself in the lawsuit the Nevada courts granted her In Forma Pauperis status (a "fee waiver" for her court filings).  Ronald D. Green immediately filed an opposition to Mayers' In Forma Pauperis in May of 2014.

On June 2, 2014 Ronald D. Green's employer and partner at Randazza Legal Group filed for a protective order against Alexandra Mayers based on public tweets (which were not sent to him directly) that he perceived as threats against himself, wife and family.   Though Alexandra Mayers never contacted Ronald D. Green's employer and partner at Randazza Legal Group or his family via telephone, has never met him in person and asked him on multiple occasions to cease communication with her via email (he habitually emailed her - click here for details)  he felt the need to attain a protective order against her which specifically stated that she should be ordered to not visit the offices of Randazza Legal Group. 

Alexandra Mayers was unable to attend the protective order hearing on July 25, 2014 - so the protective order was granted by default to Ronald D. Green's partner and employer at Randazza Legal Group.

On July 22, 2014 Ronald D. Green submitted a Notice for an Early Case Conference to the courts and sent a certified copy of the notice to Alexandra Mayers.  HOWEVER, though Ronald D. Green was well aware that his partner and employer filed for a protective order against Alexandra Mayers as of June 2nd, 2014 - which INCLUDED the business address for Randazza Legal Group, the Early Case Conference paperwork which Ronald D. Green sent and signed HIMSELF lists Randazza Legal Group's office as the location for the conference (as you can see below).ronald d green randazza legal group after protective order 01 ronald d green randazza legal group after protective order 02

There is no way that Ronald D. Green did not know about the protective order that his employer and partner filed against Alexandra Mayers - so what exactly is Ronald D. Green doing?  Is he simply an inept attorney? Is he attempting to frame Alexandra Mayers as a stalker? Is this a method to obstruct justice? Or does Ronald D. Green have the agenda of painting Alexandra Mayers in the false light of being a threat to children due to the fact that in actuality Ronald D. Green's employer and business partner is an EXTREME THREAT TO CHILDREN considering his essay in the DEFENSE of a book entitled "The Pedophile's Guide" AND his professional association and affiliation with INTERNATIONALLY KNOWN CONVICTED PEDOPHILE August Kurt Brackob aka Kurt Treptow.

Was it Ronald D. Green impersonating his client in the electronic communication Alexandra Mayers received in late January - which is what led to this lawsuit?  It seems likely.

This is not the first time Ronald D. Green has been caught essentially committing fraud on the courts.  Independent Investigative blogger Crystal Cox (who recently won through a Federal Appeals court the same free speech protections for bloggers as traditional journalist) alleges that Ronald D. Green deliberately lied in  regards to her legal issues and stated he "flat out lies about his targets, distorts laws and makes things up purely to intentionally harm his victims".  Click here to read about the situation in detail. 

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Sex Trafficking News -

Please take a look at my newest awareness project:

The pornographic industry currently promotes, is directly connected to & is built on organized crime and sextrafficking. addresses the truths of the matter.
I believe that for ANY elements of the United States pornographic industry to successfully proceed into the future, their ties to organized crime and sex (human) trafficking must be severed completely.

Monday, July 07, 2014

Where Monica Foster ends... Alexandra Mayers begins.

Buckle up and prepare for the real ride.
Make sure you follow @AlexandraMayers on twitter if you don't already.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014


*Update: The afternoon after I posted this, click here to learn what else the pornographic industry threw at me for BEING MYSELF and exercising my legal & spiritual RIGHTS

*Update 6.19.2014: Today I achieved my first legal victory against Marc Randazza - he failed to succeed in getting what he wanted from a judge in court today.

*Update 7.01.2014: Today my Motion for Dismissal wasn't granted, however I was successful in getting everything on court record via my paperwork which needed to be.  Before the case began, I already won by allowing Jesus Christ in my life to restore & save my soul. I may not make it much longer, so please CLICK HERE to read my latest thoughts and evidence of the gangstalking (organized stalking) I've endured in a blog post I've entitled "Being in Porn Can Kill You, but Speaking Out About It is the Deadliest Part" .

I found the answers I was looking for. Click here to read the truth of how far the corruption goes in regards to the pornographic industry and politics:

If I died at this moment, I'd be OK with it. Everything (even elements I didn't anticipate) came full circle and I completed the puzzle.

My court date is July 1st, 2014. I don't even care as to the outcome. Anyone "fighting" me, in actuality is just fighting themselves.

I've been fortunate enough to do just about every single thing I've always wanted to do in life.  I even have had the opportunity to do music...just recently...and you know what's funny? I don't ever need anyone to hear it. I just wanted the chance to do it.

Friday, May 16, 2014

A chart and image map of the lawsuits I'm facing - the TRUTH of the porn industry & organized crime

This is a chart and image map of the lawsuits I'm facing. It is the TRUTH of the porn industry and organized crime.
click to enlarge and download
I am not mentally ill. I am not crazy. I am not a failure.

I am an intelligent woman who's brain is wired differently than most people's. I see things that escapes many, and I do my best to convey the best way I know how what I've noticed and experienced.

I have documented the history (to my knowledge) and my interactions with the above individuals: Diane Duke of the Free Speech Coalition, Sean Tompkins of TheRealPornWikiLeaks (TRPWL), Matthew Holder, Ari Bass aka Michael Whiteacre, Will Ryder aka Jeff Mullen, Marc Randazza of Randazza Legal Group, August Kurt Brackob aka Kurt Treptow and Julie Meadows aka Lydia Ann Lee on my various websites all linked through (namely,, &

Take a look at who's pulled pleadings in regards to this lawsuit . Jeff Mullen, Mathew Holder, Ari Bass - this will be on court record.

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Why is Randazza Legal Group trying to fight my constitutional rights?

Just a brief update in regards to my legal issue with Randazza Legal Group - as of May 12, 2014 an Opposition to my In Forma Pauperis was filed by Jennifer Randazza and her representation (in otherwords her husband and his buddies).

For those who aren't aware, an In Forma Pauperis is essentially a "fee waiver" for court costs. As you my long time friends & followers know, I'm broke - in part due to having dedicated much of my life over the past few years to my activism in regards to issues pertaining to the pornographic industry such as the elements of organized crime and the much needed enforcement of workplace (health) safety legislation.

So as of last night, I wrote the Courts a Reply to the Opposition of support of my In Forma Pauperis.  I need to redo my Affidavit for it (I didn't realize you had to itemize your income and assets), so I will as soon as possible.

I just don't get it. Randazza Legal Group should be good enough attorneys (Marc Randazza especially) to win fair and justly...shouldn't they? Why are they trying to fight my constitutional rights to be able to represent myself? They're a group of people with the scholastic background, professional experience and connections which amount to them essentially being a "Goliath" opposed to little 'ole me - a simple cam girl, ex-pornstar and blogger.

I'll keep you posted - you can download my reply to the court by clicking here.

FYI - Can you believe they dug up the issue of Lenny Dykstra in their Opposition? I mean COME ON!

Oh, and one more thing - it turns out I can attend court remotely via telephone :) Thank God for that little miracle considering I'm in fear for my life when it comes being in physical proximity to anyone attached to Marc Randazza and/or my stalkers who have stated on multiple occasions they'd be there.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Answer to the Civil Suit filed against me by Randazza Legal Group

***Update: As of today I have discovered, Randazza Legal Group utilized fraudulent (fake) escort ads featuring my webcam model photographs as evidence to oppose my In Forma Pauperis (fee waiver). Those fake ads were exactly why I had to change my phone number quite a while ago! 

WHY is it so difficult for Marc Randazza to understand that I AM NOT A PROSTITUTE? I AM A WEBCAM MODEL ONLY! In my view, this situation is more PROOF Randazza Legal Group is attempting to SEXTRAFFICK me into the Nevada legal brothels, strip clubs and/or back into the porn industry.

As of current, the ONLY people who regularly state that I'm an escort/prostitute/hooker are individuals Marc Randazza himself communicates with on twitter - my stalkers Ari Bass, Sean Tompkins & their associates.

Download my civil suit court case (filed against me by Randazza Legal Group) Motion to Dismiss here if you'd like to read it:

A court date for July 1st, 2014 has been set, however due to having received death, physical harm and rape threats from parties attached to Randazza Legal Group (of which March Randazza communicates with) who have stated that they will be attending, I will not be attending unless a miracle happens.

Keep in mind, Marc Randazza of Randazza Legal group is the same man who just defended the racist Donald Sterling on CNN. In addition he (and the Free Speech Coalition) defends pedophilia and has been found to be affiliated with a known convicted pedophile.

In addition it appears that Matthew Holder, a close to 20 year pornographic industry cameraman (for studios such as Mile High Media & Penthouse) who I dated as an active pornstar is involved with Jennifer Randazza in the lawsuit. Matthew is not only the man who failed to disclose to me that he had Herpes and was involved in what resulted in an abortion of which I dealt with - in addition I was told by Keith Caggiano (of an adult novelty company called The Screaming O) after the final Halloween party I attended in Los Angeles, that Holder was my "pimp".

At this stage, just about everything in regards to the organized crime attached pornographic industry stalkers (who try to silence the truth) is now on court record via my Motion for Dismissal - and that was what needed to be done more so than anything else.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Debt Bondage, Sex Trafficking, Randazza Legal Group & Alexandra Mayers return to porn - a Monica At Home EASTER special

***Update 5/1/2014 : Twice now, individuals affiliated with Randazza Legal Group have posted the make and model of my vehicle on highly trafficked porn industry websites. The first time, was on by Marc Randazza and the second time today - on a website which links to a hardcore pornographic paysite controlled by 2 men who have stalked myself, family and various others for about 3 years now (Ari Scott Bass and Sean Tompkins). In addition, today my financial information along with my address was posted alongside a photograph of me of which Will Ryder aka Jeff Mullen (a porn director who in 2011 suggested that I commit suicide) OR Larry Flynt Productions (Hustler) owns the copyright to.
These actions by those affiliated with Randazza Legal Group appear to be an effort to incite physical harm (violence) against me and/or a murder. As of current I can not discuss the frivolous lawsuit of which Randazza Legal Group has filed against me seeking a judgement in excess of $50,000, but what I do know, is that the law suit appears to be an effort to attain my websites and sextraffick me into areas of the pornographic industry of which I'm not comfortable working in.

Click here for all the screencaps and evidence from today's webcast.

On today's special Easter edition of Monica At Home - I announce my possible return to the pornographic industry due to currently being named in a frivolous lawsuit by Jennifer of Randazza Legal Group - which is an effort to enslave me to Marc Randazza via debt bondage.

I believe Marc Randazza has a relationship with the Nevada brothels via Ari Bass aka Michael Whiteacre, Sean Tompkins (TRPWL) and Marc Spiegler. I believe their goal is to essentially sextraffick me into the Nevada legal brothel system by utilizing (and abusing) the Nevada courts to create a $10,000 debt of which I would have to pay to Jennifer Randazza if my motion to dismiss the lawsuit is not granted.

click to enlarge
In this webcast I will cover how associates of Marc Randazza (Randazza Legal Group) have habitually stalked, harassed, cyber bullied and defamed myself and family members (namely my father) over the years.

I will present evidence which shows communication between Marc Randazza and those who claimed to take down pornwikileaks, but did not - as well as evidence of which I believe points to the initial communication I received (of which I believed was from Jennifer Randazza) in actuality being a "set-up" by Randazza Legal Group in effort to establish grounds for a lawsuit.

click to enlarge
the truth of
Michael Whiteacre
In effort to not be forced into the Nevada Brothels via this lawsuit by Randazza Legal Group, I have opted to announce that I will return to the pornographic industry as a performer if a $10,000 legal judgement is made against me. As a solo independent webcam girl I don't believe I could pay off a $10,000 in the time given to me, but by re-entering the pornographic industry I may be able to.

Regardless, I fear for my life at this stage. If I return to pornography I believe I am bound to contract HIV / AIDS - so if the Nevada courts rule against me - they are essentially a party to manslaughter (aka murder).

I believe the current situation of which I'm in, is solid evidence of how the pornographic industry will not allow performers to leave (or speak out).
Click to enlarge - proof in the form of a comment from an adult industry blog that since 2011 Sean Tompkins aka TRPWL has been working with people I believe to be attached to organized crime within the pornographic industry (within the Free Speech Coalition) to file a fraudulent civil lawsuit against me.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Monica Foster at Home 2014 - Thursday 04-17-2014

On this webcast I discuss the truth of what I feel Michael Weinstein of the Aids Healthcare Foundation is really up against, why I feel his safety and life is in danger of an anti-Semitic hate crime and why every pornstar's life is currently in danger of a major corporation who's willing to put profits above the health and safety of human lives.

As of current a gay male model and pornstar by the name of Eric Paul Leue has created a petition on in effort to force Michael Weinstein to resign. The petition is "officially" backed by the Free Speech Coalition and Xbiz magazine, but I'm also under the impression that Eric Paul Leue is backed by the multi-million dollar pharmaceutical Gilead Sciences - the manufacturers of Truvada (a medication being marketed as "the new condom" though it doesn't protect against STDs other than HIV - further more the clinical definitive findings will not be published about Truvada until 2017).

At this stage, I feel that Gilead Sciences has targeted the Aids Healthcare Foundation and the Free Speech Coalition as a means of not only marketing Truvada, but a way to gain access to female pornstars to use as a "test subject" pool for Truvada clinical studies. As of current though Truvada has been found to be very effective in males, it hasn't been equally effective in clinical trials for females.

As of current Michael Weinstein in my view is the only person standing between female pornstars being used essentially as "lab rats" and Gilead Sciences.

Condom legislation must be adhered to and mandatory condom usage must be present in adult filming.