Friday, December 30, 2011

For Immediate Release:

Ex-Pornstar and current Anti-Porn activist Monica Foster, who is best known for her widely publicized scandal with baseball legend Lenny Dykstra in regards to a bad check for the amount of $1000 dollars, has returned to the spotlight with the launch of a sports and entertainment webcast entitled Dykstra’s Escort on Sports ( and ).

“ is the manifestation of me raising my fist in the air and proclaiming that I’m in it to win it and own it.”, states Monica Foster. “Since leaving the Los Angeles porn industry in early 2009 to rebuild my life away from the world of adult entertainment, and since taking a stand and speaking out against the illegal activities within and attached to the porn industry via my anti-porn website – both I and my close family members have been consistently stalked, terrorized, intimidated, threatened and harassed.”

Monica Foster goes on to say, “The stalking, threats, and harassment from people in and attached to the Los Angeles porn industry escalated dramatically when I found myself at the center of a media frenzy after my encounter with Lenny Dykstra. At that point in my life I knew I had to make a major change. I’ve spent the past year cleaning up and rebuilding my life. My goal is to move into the arena of health, fitness and wellness being that in my youth I was an avid athlete and have always been very health conscience. I’ve always had a major love of sports and technology so I feel this new innovative sports and entertainment webcast will be a fun way to reconnect with my interest in sports and athletics while turning a negative instance from my past that my stalkers and critics like to use most against me, into something positive”.

Monica’s webcast Dykstra’s Escort on Sports will launch Decemeber 31st at 4pm PST / 7pm EST – for the live webcast links visit or and make sure to follow Monica Foster on twitter by visiting on

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A little something new I've put together for my friends, fans and foes to enjoy...

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Enjoy a new broadcast of !

Enjoy this editorial cartoon as well - more on

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

As of today - this time of my life has come about full circle.

2012 will be wonderful.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

An editorial cartoon, also known as a political cartoon, is an illustration containing a commentary that usually relates to current events or personalities.

They typically combine artistic skill, hyperbole and biting humour in order to question authority and draw attention to corruption and other social ills. - just for kicks...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

As we move from 2011 to 2012, I can't help but let out a HUGE sigh of relief. This past year (well these past few years for that matter) have been quite the journey - and ultimately quite the MISSION.

The trials and tribulations of which I've had to endure over the past few years have brought me closer to God and Jesus Christ, than I ever could have thought possible. I am so THANKFUL and FORTUNATE to be where I reside spiritually as of current.

People often say that God reserves his most difficult missions and tasks for his strongest, best and brightest... Well, I believe it considering the type of person that I am, the life I've been granted to live and the path that I've been guided to take.

My motto on my official website: for the past few years has been "I'm in it to win it." Well - I was, and I won. I didn't "win" in the way I envisioned I would - however the actual "win" has been FAR better than I ever could have anticipated.

2012 will be my final year of working as a webcam model. There are many other professional ventures of which I need to focus my time and energy on, and truthfully I don't feel that God and Jesus Christ want me to share my nude body with the world beyond that point in time.

My presence in the world of adult entertainment was a miracle which needed to happen, to assist in bringing to light the TRUTH of the satanic, demonic and evil presence within the world of adult entertainment.

My journey into the porn industry was a mission from God, which is nearly complete - and my personal sacrifice of having to share my nude body, sexual presence and soul with the world for THE TRUTH to come out, of what the adult entertainment industry REALLY IS - was worth it.

It's comforting to know that so many of you (my fans, friends and supporters) are appreciative of all the trouble I've had to go through. Knowing that I've saved (and will continue to save via my legacy) countless lives makes me feel at peace.

I am LIVING PROOF of God AND miracles being real. Only God and a miracle could have caused me to think that working in the porn industry would be a good idea. Only GOD and a miracle could have delivered me safely away from the EVIL that I encountered, which tried to destroy my life. Finally, ONLY GOD AND A MIRACLE, could have returned my sanity (because I was clearly out of my mind to have worked in the Los Angeles porn industry), so that I can share with the world the truth of my experiences within the Los Angeles porn sphere.

As of current my life is better than I ever could have asked for.  Financially I'm doing well, my relationships with my family members are great and I now know exactly who my REAL friends are. I'm extremely happy and feel very whole. God, Jesus Christ and the Light have rewarded me for all my hard work (that I didn't even realize I was doing) and it's just AWESOME!

Yes, a few idiots in and attached to the Los Angeles porn industry are still attempting to bother me, but I have it on good authority as of TODAY that the wrath of God is coming down upon them.

To conclude, no other woman on this planet with my looks, intelligence, background and heart would deal with those who are the Los Angeles porn industry UNLESS God felt it was necessary for her to do so. IT JUST WOULD NOT EVER NORMALLY HAPPEN - so the next time you hear someone doubt the reality of God, Jesus Christ or miracles just direct them to my official Monica Foster website

M.F. stands for Monica Foster & MIRACLES are FACT

If you know of any women personally in the Los Angeles porn industry, tell them to leave ASAP. Let them know they're too good for those sick losers. Tell them to visit as well :)

Thursday, December 08, 2011

One of my twitter peeps @BrichBrinson who run's a radio show on asked me to be a guest on his show last night - enjoy the broadcast replay below.

Listen to internet radio with Naughtydownadvi on Blog Talk Radio

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

A great piece of advice - courtesy a comment from a recent post on

Eric | December 7, 2011 at 4:47 pm

I’m probably a little older than some of you, so I’ll give you the same advice my father gave me regarding bullies. Kick the shit out of them. Beat them like a rented mule.

This was before the days of some liberal lawyer suing a school district or some gay kid going on TV and telling everybody how he had to change districts.

Kick the shit out of the bully. If you are too small or too afraid, find three or four other small, afraid kids and kick the shit out of the bully. If you are a kid who isn’t being a bully but you see somebody being a bully, kick the shit out of them.

Whine all you want about Facebook and Twitter and how much harder it is now. Bullshit. Kick the shit out of the bully. Worked then, it’ll work now.

What was that advice again?

Kick the shit out of the bully.

Monday, December 05, 2011

An interesting article about organized stalking, Weinergate, Mike Stack, Desi Foxx and Pornwikileaks.
From the website

Monica Foster at Home - Christian Pornstar Edition 04 from Monica Foster on Vimeo.

Monica Foster talks about the movement, shares her views on the extreme dangers of porn, the AHF's efforts to make condom use mandatory in the Los Angeles porn industry, the importance of having a spiritual Christian foundation and the porn industry's ties to organized crime (along with their organized stalking activity).

Sunday, December 04, 2011

I'll be live on webcam all weekend!

Call Button

Thursday, December 01, 2011

As of late I've really been enjoying life.

My energy level is very high at this time, because I've fine tuned my already healthy diet a bit more.

I've also limited myself to enjoying wine no more than once a week (if that), have increased my water intake AND have ceased being a casual smoker (that's right - I'm nicotine free).

I still probably drink a bit too much coffee, but in time I will work on that as well. January of 2012 I will relaunch the RIGHT way and with a much improved physique and attitude :)

The foundation of all the life improvements I've been making has been my personal form of Christianity Alexandralism ( It is based on the teachings of the ancient church and school of Alexandria (in Egypt) along with my unique life perspective and views.

I understand that my ideas are viewed as unconventional and controversial by many - but I will not tolerate being threatened by those who have opposing views. I invite you all to read a recent article I wrote about being threatened and harassed recently due to my being a Christian and following my personal form of Christianity.

On a happier note - a friend of mine, Desi Foxx has launched a new blog called - so check it out.

I've been very busy with my various blogs and websites ( , , , , , , etc) and art work (on along with my webcamming and producing new content for the members area of which I will be rebuilding this month.

I have to say I love being busy at this stage of life - it's nice to have finally developed a sense of "purpose" and steady drive.

Beginning early Spring of 2012 I plan on traveling throughout the United States to promote my books, attend some adult industry conventions, photograph some upcoming adult and non-adult entertainers and conduct some interviews. I will post information in regards to my travel schedule later this month.

I'll be live on webcam for private shows beginning this morning and throughout the weekend - just visit for details on connecting with me :) Have a fabulous weekend!

Monday, November 28, 2011

The new genera of Adult Entertainment 

I will be producing the first Christian Porn content in 2012
Look forward to it and welcome to the future.

Monica Foster at Home - Christian Pornstar Edition 03 - 21 Commandments , Alexandralism & Prayers from Monica Foster on Vimeo.

Friday, November 25, 2011

I will be live on webcam all weekend! Connect with me via my official website or on

Sunday, November 20, 2011

I'll be live on webcam all weekend - make sure to get a private show with me!

Links to me on

Friday, November 18, 2011

On this edition of Monica Foster at Home - Christian Pornstar edition , I discuss the concept of "Christian Porn" - is it possible? If it is, what should be the guidelines?

Later in the broadcast I touch on several porn and "sex" related news items:

  • the Herman Cain / Sharon Bialek allegations and Gloria Allred 's connections to the porn industry
  • pornstar and reality star Kim Kardashian in the new Tyler Perry movie "The Marriage Counselor"
  • Sasha Grey and her choice to read to first grade students in a Compton predominantly black and latin elementary school
  • Pedophilia - the number one problem (according to Corey Feldman and many others ) in Hollywood -  and how I feel the porn industry, specifically certain porn professionals, may be encouraging and supporting the problem.  I note how the youngest character ( Rudy ) in Not The Cosbys XXX 2 (directed by Jeff Mullen aka Will Ryder ) was not depicted as being over the age of 18 years old (please skip to the 32 minutes mark to see footage from the movie and behind the scenes footage of the Rudy character clearly being depicted as a child) footage use via the US fair use act .

Keep in mind Not the Cosbys XXX 1 and 2 won several awards from AVN and Xbiz which in my view solidifies the Los Angeles porn industry supporting pedophilia themed porn, which supports the concept of child abuse world wide.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Tonight (this morning) I am sad, disappointed, ashamed (for having ever dealt with the United States porn industry) and ANGRY!

An adult content studio by the name of Evasive Angles created a porn parody based on Alex Haley's Roots

In a video blog I created on I discuss this issue.

Click here to sign the petition I created on about this issue.

Please assist me in halting it's distribution. I have made mistakes in the past (1 especially which was my participation in a parody that I am ASHAMED to have been a part of as of current), but it's not too late to correct and STOP other mistakes such as that from occurring.

I have compiled a list of people to contact who need to be aware of this situation and who may be able to assist in efforts to halt this movie's distribution - click here.

Monday, November 07, 2011

Yesterday's broadcast of Monica Foster @ Home - Christian Pornstar edition !

Friday, November 04, 2011

Check this video about Anti-Gravity technology - quite cool (literally)!

This Sunday at 3pm PST I will be conducting my first webcast for on - see you there.

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

There are some very good perspectives out there as to what really goes on in the porn industry. Here are some of my top picks.
by Monica Foster

Truth Behind the Fantasy of Porn
by Shelley Lubben
by Desi Foxx

The porn industry is much more than "porn" - many aspects of it are gateways to turning away from God, Jesus, the Light, and Good. I'm an unconventional Christian, but a Christian none the less - that's what's in my core.

I don't believe that Christianity is the only "right" path - I think all paths rooted in God, the light, good and doing what's right, each have a piece of the puzzle which makes up the "big picture".

I've wondered for a while why my life has taken the road it has - and I finally have a resolution. I feel that God set me on a mission to point other's in the "right direction", who've taken the road that I have - but who might still be a bit lost.

I suppose what I'm saying - is that I'm up for the job of being a "sign post" I suppose.

If there's one thing I've realized on my journey through the Los Angeles porn circuit - it's that through guilt and despair - certain "porn professionals" attempt to turn God's children away from the light permanently (and if they resist - these jerks will use " gang stalking " tactics to drive these souls to suicide before they can make it back to the light). The reason, is to attempt to gather souls and energy for their weak, demonic, satanic and losing side. I know because this nearly happened to me - but it didn't (God sent me some help just in time).

If you are reading this, I urge you to reach out to any adult industry worker you know, and tell them that they ARE GOOD ENOUGH for God, Jesus, good and/or the light. They just have to make a step in the right direction.

No one has to be perfect - you just need to try your best to do the right thing when you know you can.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Here are a few of the results from some photos sets I took of myself today. Quite a few of the photos from today I'll be using in my 2012 Monica Foster calendar project which will be available before Christmas.

Below is a new photo of me. Taking some more today :)

I've been feeling very good lately - very centered, relaxed and "at peace". If you want to see how I'm doing daily - follow me on twitter:

Thursday, October 20, 2011

A little something I manifested to create a window to my past, that I can open and look through anytime I desire.

It's Porn Industry news from my perspective, and it doesn't matter whether anyone likes it or not. 

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The above clip is one of my all time favorite movie scenes.
Featuring Robin Givens and the legendary Grace Jones !

Monday, October 17, 2011

Diane Duke - Executive Director of the Free
Speech Coalition (FSC) - Is her goal to extort the
public and pervert the minds of children all in the
name of PORN and MONEY? Seems like it.
Update: 1.3.2012 - Donny Long was utilized a a scapegoat for PornWikiLeaks. Click here for the truth.
On July 21, 2010 I wrote a blog entitled PornWikiLeaks 2.0 could happen including the names of pornstars AND porn VIEWERS. I was right (I hate being so darned accurate about the future of porn at times).

Porn companies and those with interest in the porn industry such as the FSC (Free Speech Coalition) over the past few months in the USAhave kept their attorneys busy filing lawsuits to "stop pirating" - but not against the file sharing sites (many of which the porn studios actually own). Instead against the end users who download the content. These lawsuits of course are all intended to be "settled" .

In the US, lawyers have issued tens of thousands of letters of demand to people accused of illegally downloading explicit content in the past year. Typically, these letters suggest that if the case were to go to court, the alleged downloader could, if found guilty, face fines of up to $150,000, plus costs.

Alternatively, they are told, the case could be settled immediately for a small fee, generally just a few thousand dollars. Many pay up rather than face the possible expense and humiliation of a court case. A similar approach has also been used with some success in Britain.

One of the primary attorneys handling these lawsuits in the US (Los Angeles - Porn Valley) ironically is Michael Fattorosi - the EXACT same attorney who advised Donny Long and other operators of the PornWikiLeaks website which terrorized, harassed, stalked and released the personal information of countless adult industry performers and professionals.

Looking back at the pornwikileaks issue - I still believe that it's intent may have been to eradicate adult performer's anonymity simply so lawyers representing porn studios would have justification in exposing the personal info of the end users the porn studios were planning to sue later if the user chose NOT to settle out of court.

Apparently this "extortion" trend the financially broken porn industry has begun to utilize just hit Australia. An Australian company trying to sue people for illegally downloading Hollywood movie Kill the Irishman has extensive links to internet pornography, raising suspicions that the legal action may in fact be a stalking horse for a larger assault on behalf of the porn industry.

As reported by Fairfax this month, Brisbane law firm Lloyds Solicitors, acting on behalf of the Gold Coast-based Movie Rights Group, has written to internet service providers including Telstra, iiNet, Internode and Exetel seeking the details of thousands of people alleged to have illegally downloaded the crime thriller Kill the Irishman in May.

An investigation by Fairfax has since revealed that the New Zealand-born brothers behind Movie Rights Group (Matthew Clapham and Richard Clapham) are major players in the internet porn industry, raising the possibility that their real motive is to sue thousands of Australians who have downloaded porn without paying for it.

Richard Clapham

What I find interesting about this situation is that an organization here in the United States called the Free Speech Coalition (the FSC) while in support of these anti-piracy tactics (at one point in time Michael Fattorosi attempted to be a board member on the FSC), is AGAINST the implementation of the .XXX extension which would help to protect children from accessing porn online AND has gone as far as to grant membership to the FSC and support pornographers who depict children having sex in adult content.

Matthew Clapham
Amazing how completely disrespectful the so called "professionals" in and attached to the porn industry are in regards to the public. Porn professionals virtually invade your home, tempt you with "free" downloads, pervert your children, and then extort you later under the threat of humiliation.

Porn fans, you're far better off dealing with a LIVE and INDEPENDENT webcam girl in my opinion than bothering to support the unethical con-artists and extortionists which make up the traditional "porn industry".

opinion / editorial by Monica Foster

Having fun and laughing more while beetles stop by and say hi (from

As I move forward through life (as if I or anyone else really has a choice - I still haven't seen any time machines on Yahoo shopping) I'm finding far more things comedic and entertaining than I used to.

I laugh at myself much more. I also find my negative feelings in regards to events and people from my past funny now days - primarily due to my realization of having placed far too much importance on things that really don't matter when it comes to the "big picture" of life.

This is an interesting phase to reside in.

Maybe I'm reaching true happiness. Who least I'm smiling more and am having some fun.

The only thing missing is a partner to be happy and have fun with.
From the Animal Totem Dictionary...
Although there is naturally a great attraction to spiritual matters, June Bug/Beetle will show how to balance and remain grounded. His wisdom teaches to navigate what is hidden in the sub/unconscious realms. Pay attention to nocturnal activities: dream time, journeys, and moments of waking, along with meditational impressions. Expect emotions to come to the surface as well as being emotionally tested in order to clean and clear the way for new and better things. Mental, spiritual, emotional movement appears in sets of 3.

Pay attention to synchronicities. He demonstrates exterior strength and fortitude and the use of a tough outer shell when needed. June Bug/Beetle demonstrates a higher intuition connection and a keen sense of discernment in all areas. He will show how to dig for answers to reveal the truths you need. He shows how to move with a sharp sense of timing. His medicine represents opportunities to recycle, reinvent and repurpose what you have, know, think and act. This self-reinvention may include participating in larger groups to expand knowledge and awareness. A balanced diet includes plenty of fruits, vegetables and grains. May or June is a significant indicator of events. The time period for June Bug/Beetle has various stages. Take notice of circumstances, dreams, wishes and encounters that may happen within the next two to five days. In 3 to 4 weeks lessons will be coming to swift manifestation. Be ready. In the last two to three years, have you been inspired to do something, have unfinished projects or endeavors that have been delayed? He will show how to progress forward as it is time to emerge.
The cause for .XXX domains gained ground today due to the Sesame Street porn incident. 

On October 16th, 2011 some idiot decided it would be fun to add porn clips to the Sesame Street youtube channel (click here to read about it on I suppose it's not enough to add adult rated content to video games that teenagers have access too. Certain people are out to PERVERT the minds of children as well (I've been saying for a while now that quite a few porn industry "professionals" have an abnormal fixation with the merger of SEX and CHILDREN and keep trying to depict child themed situations in their porn movies - porn director Will Ryder sure did in that damn Not The Cosbys XXX 2 movie. )

Fortunately the operators of the Sesame Street youtube channel caught the incident within 22 mins of the clips being posted - however the channel did become unavailable.

In my view, this incident most likely will assist in the .XXX domain coming into effect and shortly being MANDATORY for all adult content to be placed under. Certain "porn professionals" have bitched and moaned about the cost of the domains, but perhaps that's PUNISHMENT for the lack of professionalism and responsibility the porn industry has displayed over the past decade.
The availability of adult material to youngsters is reaching a level of being out of control, and since a centralized internal regulation system which should monitor, control and account for such incidents and individuals is not in place - the government most likely will have to step in and create new laws.
When an internal system doesn't exist or fails, and external system will step in. Either conform or DEFECT (in other words get the fuck out the USA you unprofessional porn industry DEGENERATES)

Friday, October 14, 2011

Porn Wiki Leaks and projects of the like are a form of Gang Stalking.

If you are or were a victim of the Pornwikileaks project (or something similar) and are seeking understanding - I strongly advise you visit:
Also watch the following video (and it's associated part 2, 3, etc):
Also click the following link for resources on youtube:

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

My latest art piece entitled "Remembering" is available online for purchase on:

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Get a webcam show from me this week! I'm going to try to be online 24/7 !
(yea, we'll see how that works out - LOL)

I've noticed a few commenters on certain adult blogs and forums having issue with my continuing to discuss the adult entertainment industry (along with my continuation to work within it independently) since my departure from the Los Angeles porn circuit. 

To those people, I have the following thought to share:

You can’t abort a baby once it’s born.

You can ask your brother or parents to raise it and never let that baby know you’re the parent, yes. You can put it up for adoption – sure. You can put it in the garbage even.

The thing is no matter what you do, that baby still will be around and still will be a part of you and still have your traits. You’ll ALWAYS be aware of it and that’s simply the punishment and burden you can’t avoid in such a situation.

Even if you KILL THE BABY, that baby still was there at one point and you’ll never forget it, and more than likely someone else will remember that at one point you were indeed pregnant with it and if that baby isn’t around after 9 months – questions will be asked.

The best thing to do with an unwanted baby – especially if you don’t want that baby to grow up, seek you out and turn on you once it realizes how much it was unwanted – is to ensure that baby is taken care of in the BEST way possible and that it’s allowed to grow and develop in such a healthy and happy fashion that you, the irresponsible selfish and incapable parent almost NEVER cross the mind of that (now grown) individual.

It’s also a great idea to stay as far away from that baby as possible once it becomes an adult being that you didn’t have the nerve to kill it when you could.

That baby deserves to live their life in ANY WAY THEY WANT – and most likely since that baby carries your genes – some things they do in life may be similar to things you’ve done…BUT that baby has someone else’s genes too, so they’re not exactly LIKE you and most likely are better and stronger than you being that they survived your rejection. I suppose that’s just how evolution works…

So to conclude, remember – you gave that baby up so you no longer have any right to dictate what that baby does or how that baby lives. My suggestion, is to always use birth control in the future so you don’t have to deal with such pain ever again.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Monica Foster on Dollhouse Radio - hosted by Sexy India
Listen to internet radio with SEXY INDIA on Blog Talk Radio

Friday, September 23, 2011

As of today, I've come to the conclusion that it's time that I forgive Donny Long aka Donald Carlos Seoane - an ex pornstar , porn director and studio owner who was heavily involved in the Pornwikileaks project.

From December of 2010 to the present date, I've learned much more than I ever cared to about each and every individual who was involved in the Pornwikileaks project ; along with those who claimed to be against it, but in actuality stood to gain much from it's presence and closure.

I will never forget Donald's actions, however I do forgive him. I wish he and his family the best and I hope he in time is able to be a good father to his child.

Update: 1.3.2012 - Donny Long was utilized a a scapegoat for PornWikiLeaks. Click here for the truth.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Today I shipped off another piece of art I was commissioned to paint by one of my twitter followers. I'm starting to find it a bit difficult to send away my artwork - I suppose because my art is a piece of my being - however I know this particular piece will wind up in a very good home.

"Manifestation Focus"

I always ship my art framed, because well - I feel like it's the least I can do. This particular acrylic painting I am truly proud of, so I decided to scan it, and will be selling the scans as high resolution 8x10 framed signed and numbered prints. 

If anyone out there reading this is interested in one of my original paintings you can purchase one through my online art store on or you can ask me to create a custom piece for you by contacting me through the 'Contact' form on my website

Thursday, September 08, 2011

My final thoughts (for now at least) on the
Daisy Dare vs. MarcFromTheDark situation.

I'm glad I'm not the judge of "Pornstar Court"
Click the above link to read my thoughts - I made a separate page for my thoughts considering
how lengthy they are (as usual).

Monica Foster of, interviews pornstar Tucker Slain in effort to gets to the root of some recent issues within the porn and adult entertainment industry.
This video piece begins with footage of the Tucker Slain / Daisy Dare / Kenny webshows (footage provided by Marc / MarcFromTheDark ). Monica then interviews Tucker and he relates his experiences, thoughts and observations in regards to the very serious MarcFromTheDark vs Daisy Dare allegations (links can be found on )

Then Tucker Slain goes on to share his experiences and thoughts with pornstars Chad Diamond, Alana Evans and her husband Chris, Grace Evangeline, Beverly Paige, Scarlett Fey, Kendra Secrets, ChristianXXX, and the late Hunter Bryce.

Tucker Slain discusses his involvement with the August 2011 HIV case in the porn industry of which initially a performer allegedly tested positive, but has since tested negative.

Tucker also shares how he hopes that porn legend Tabitha Stevens does not believe what Alana Evans has been stating in regards to him, as he greatly admires and hopes to someday work with Tabitha.
Tucker Slain explains how his goal is not to be a pornstar - but rather a musician in time, however while he is in porn he will strive to be as professional and considerate as possible being that he loves being a part of the industry not just as a performer, but as a webcam model, entrepreneur and driver for performers without vehicles.

(side note: I have additional "Tucker Slain thoughts" that I will be editing together in the future in another video. Due to this video already being very long I had to leave them out).

Tuesday, September 06, 2011

Part 1


1-2-3-4 do I detect a twitter war? Maybe it should be more like 1-2-3-4- I declare a pimp war!

Recently a young lady who decided to take the plunge into the Los Angeles adult entertainment ( porn ) industry wrote a rather disturbing email / manifesto to a friend of mine who runs Daisy made several very serious allegations against a man by the name of Marc Drescher who whom brought her out to Los Angeles and who she worked with upon arrival.

Though I had the chance to speak with Daisy and set up an interview to get more details from her side of the situation, I have was notified at the scheduled time of the interview without prior notice that she now has legal council and has been advised not to do interviews.

I was contacted shortly after by Marc Drescher who wanted to share his side of the situation so the same day of Daisy's canceled interview, I interviewed him. Please watch parts 1 through 3 of this interview set featuring Marc Drescher (@markfromthedark), Britany Blaze (@Brittany_Blaze), Amanda Blow (@Amandablow), and last but not least Tucker Slain (@tuckerslain ). All individuals share their thoughts and perspectives on what is a rare look at a rather common situation in the adult entertainment sphere.

This particular situation is a rather dramatic one - however I personally feel all parties of whom I've spoken with are incredibly talented and intelligent individuals ( though they've taken an unconventional road in life ) and have been sincere.


Daisy Dare 's initial post / manifesto on

Marc Drescher 's official website:

Marc on

AdultTalentRegistry on
Brittany Blaze 's official website

Amanda Blow's blog

Brittany Blaze and Amanda Blow on

Daisy Dare on Twitter

TuckerSlain on Twitter

Information on the Porn Industry - and

Friday, September 02, 2011

Just added my latest painting to my online art shop.  If you'd like to own a piece of me feel free to purchase it by clicking here.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Well it's almost the end of the Summer, so as a special treat for Fall, I'll be bringing an entire set of brand-new self produced solo videos to

Enjoy :)

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

For those of you interested in purchasing my art, you can do so on my online store: 
(under my real name obviously).
I uploaded my first piece "Interdimensional Fertilization" tonight.

Friday, August 05, 2011

I'm still on Summer hiatus but I couldn't resist doing this Skype Interview with Misti Dawn of

On this Interview Edition of Monica Foster at Home, I interview the incredibly intelligent and creative pornstar, model, and self described nerd Misti Dawn of

This interview covers Misti's introduction to the adult entertainment world, her thoughts and experiences as a pornstar, some mainstream projects she's been a part of, the history and meaning behind her tattoos, along with how she's stayed true to who she is rather than allowing herself to be "remade" by the porn industry.

Misti shares her point of view in regards to an issue she had with Burning Angel ( Joanna Angel and Michael Fattorosi specifically ) and tells why she's since parted ways with the company.

Misti Dawn relates how much she enjoyed working with Belladonna and appreciates her performance style and shares what her ideal project would be to produce.

Misti explains how her technological background has assisted with her continuing to market herself independently and shares news on her upcoming independent and joint projects with other studios.

Misti finally shares how her video game (gamer girl) skills just landed her a new role in an upcoming feature from New Sensations.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

On break from this blog, but I'll be back around September.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Update: 1.3.2012 - Donny Long was utilized a a scapegoat for PornWikiLeaks. Click here for the truth.

This was a comment I posted tonight in response to a post on in regards to my friend Mike South being disgusted over the pornwikileaks issue:

Pornwikileaks 2.0 could easily happen if the people behind the site are not brought to justice AND if the blueprint of the website is not patented and then made ILLEGAL within the USA (and beyond). Here I'll tell you why - along with why certain people in the porn industry will continue to back Michael Fattorosi aka Pornlaw of AdultBizLaw.

Here's what I realized from looking at some comments here in regards to Fattorosi tonight.

Certain people in the industry - namely those who have paid their $100 per months to be in club AdultBizLaw dot com will keep their mouth's shut about him and even attempt to separate Fattorosi from this entire situation completely (maybe even support him). Wanna know why? I'll tell you why.

Fattorosi is set to attempt to make ALOT of people in porn a ton of money who have lost money over the past few years.

PWL was just a test - only a test (at least in my view).

Here's the thing - Fattorosi is a forerunner in the upcoming trend for porn studios to sue "John Does" for downloading pirated porn from the bittorrent sites. This will work via such sites collecting the IP addresses of all the bored and horny schmucks out there who think they hit paydirt with a "free porn download" site (which I wouldn't be surprised if such sites were run and maintained by the studios themselves - those darn greedy SOBs - kinda like how certain studios own and maintain tube sites).

Then the sites will hand over the IP's to Fattorosi or some other creature like him who in turn will work with the cable/internet companies to track the IPs to "John Doe".

"John Doe" will then be contacted with a settlement agreement saying "if you don't pay us x amount of dollars for downloading GangBanger #56 from such and such bittorrent site, we're going to sue you and it will go on LEGAL RECORD your real name, what you stole (downloaded), what date, what time etc - oh and by the way - this will all be public information" - get it? LEGAL EXTORTION.

And don't ya know that PWL 2.0 (or maybe more like JohnDoeWikiLeaks) will pop up and some point with ALL the "John Doe" info that Google will probably be oh so happy to index? Just think - "John Doe" googles his own name one day and what pops up? "John Doe is a sex addict who downloaded GangBangers #56 on on 01/01/2012 - and he lives at 123 fucked street".

And the porn industry bottom feeder like Fattorosi will justify all this by saying "well the porn talent's had their private personal info outed in PWL and nothing was ALL public information - shouldn't it be the same for the John Doe's who we basically BAIT into stealing our content? - it's not our fault pornstar's info was amassed in one easy to search site - it was Donny Long's fault".

Looks to me like certain people in porn realized that there IS a way to make money from a supposedly "free" product. It's kinda like those gypsy fortune tellers on the street who grab your hand and read your palm - and who then DEMAND $10 or more when you never asked for a reading in the first place.

Lets see, what am I forgetting here...OH! Did you all know that the very first lawsuit (which is intended to be settle out of court) of this type is in regards to the Paris Hilton sex tape? Yep - Kevin Blatt brokered that and wouldn't you know that he was in business with Fattorosi at one point in time in regards to his 2257safe / 2257snap venture?

Think I'm wrong? Read this:

You don't try to legitimize a business in America by fucking over the country's citizens in this fashion. People will not tolerate it - if you can't get it together LEAVE THE COUNTRY AND NEVER COME BACK.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Update: 1.3.2012 - Donny Long was utilized a a scapegoat for PornWikiLeaks. Click here for the truth.
Why Michael Fattorosi assisted Donny Long with Pornwikileaks - Tara and Vanessa Blue are involved.

Since I and my family members have been attacked and exploited via the Pornwikileaks (PWL) project along with several other adult entertainment industry professionals - the primary question that's been on my mind has been "Why?". I understand that there aren't always solid concrete answers to every question and circumstance in life, but more often than not, I've found that there are truths and answers to most questions - however unusual, odd or unexpected those answers may at times be.

A small group of people, from both within and outside of the adult entertainment industry, have launched an investigation as to who exactly is behind the PWL project, and slowly but surely some names and IDs of those involved have been firmly attached. For details, please visit and

Though some people immediately attached to the project (the primary driving forces behind it) were expected (such as Donny Long aka Donald Carlos Seoane), others have been a bit unexpected (such as Jerry Aharony - owner of Mallcom Inc, Tara Akinlose of and Michael Fattorosi - better known as "Pornlaw" of ).

Though it's been known for quite some time that Donny Long is mentally unstable and seeking revenge upon the entire porn industry, and that companies ( that I view as being unethical ) like Mallcom Inc / (owned by Jerry Aharony) will attach themselves to virtually any steady internet traffic source they can find being that we're living in a floundering economy - the motives and thought processes behind others involved - namely Michael Fattorosi - have been somewhat confusing.

Many have questioned at this stage exactly WHY Michael Fattorosi would align himself with Donny Long and PWL considering the extreme racist overtones of the project being that he's been in a long term relationship with Vanessa Blue - an African-American pornstar.

That's why I decided to look a bit closer at the history of Michael Fattorosi's rise to prominence within the adult entertainment industry - which I found to be heavily dependent on his association with Vanessa Blue.

Upon researching Vanessa Blue's history I found quite a few disturbing elements which have lead me to believe that she has indeed been instrumental and most likely heavily involved in the PWL project - primarily due to having a personal vendetta against "crossover" male talents (which may have been prompted by her breakup in 2005 from Lexington Steele due to his rumored bisexuality), and because she may have realized that PWL would be an excellent tool to utilize to either hurt or destroy other studio owners she may view as her competition (therefor advancing her own career and income).

In this video I outline Vanessa Blue's personal and professional history, and reference several articles and interviews with Blue. A glaringly common element or theme within much of the material I read about Blue had to do with her insecurities in regards to her ethnicity and her overall low self esteem.

I cover details in this video piece in regards to Blue's relationship with Lexington Steele along with when and how it fell apart. I also document the entrance of Fattorosi into Blue's life and how he may have exploited Blue's circumstance and dysfunction to suit his own agendas and rise to prominence within an industry full of individuals that would be relatively easy for someone of his character to manipulate.

I present an overview of who Blue and Fattorosi have been attached to and who they've dealt with over the years and why some of these individuals have been attacked by PWL extensively where as others have been "shielded" from the venture entirely.

On a personal note, I feel that I and my family were heavily attacked by PWL, primarily because my family situation (and my father especially) may have reminded Blue about what she went through in regards to her relationship with Lexington Steele - I feel she was projecting.

Blue in my opinion may need to go into counseling or therapy at this stage in her life (and should probably get as far away from Fattorosi as possible, because he appears to encourage her hate and enable her dysfunctional behavior), because her hate filled homophobic online activity is wrong (it dates back to 2007 according to Christian XXX' s blog) and unacceptable. Furthmore her self loathing is beyond the term of "unhealthy".

I also include my thoughts on Tara Akinlose in this video and share how I see her fitting into the picture along with how I feel she's been utilized as a "worker bee" by Blue, Fattorosi and/or Long to carry out various tasks against certain individuals who may have been perceived as "threats" (Christian XXX, Mercedes Ashley, Mariah Milano, Nina Mercedes and myself).

For links to the referenced articles and websites noted in the video, please visit

Friday, July 08, 2011

Update: 1.3.2012 - Donny Long was utilized a a scapegoat for PornWikiLeaks. Click here for the truth.
Last night a big part of the truth came out in regards to the terrorism and on/offline stalking I've been dealing with since December in regards to the Pornwikileaks project.

At this moment I am not sure how to feel so I'll just share the following:

Thanks to Mike South of , Sean of , and quite a few other helpful, brave and good souls quite a few identities have been brought to light who have had involvement with Pornwikileaks - but there is one in particular who stands out along with Donald Carlos Seoane (aka Donny Long).

Her name is Tara Akinlose and she runs a blog called and many other online ventures.

Tara Akinlose is an African-American woman who has never worked in porn with the exception of being an event photographer and relatively unskilled website developer. Tara has an unhealthy possibly psychotic obsessesion with individuals in the industry and especially has a personal vendetta against African-American female pornstars due to jealousy, envy and her feelings of insecurity and inadequacy.

I now realize that much of the negativity I've dealt with has stemmed from Tara. Why she fixated on me - I can clearly see. I'm everything that she was never brave enough to become. I'm not the first woman however who's life she's affected. Read about a publicised altercation she was involved with (between herself, a male adult industry talent named Mark Davis and 2 other African American female adult actresses named Kitten and Sinnamon Love):

Tara Akinlose has been causing issues for people on and offline via aliases since 2006:

It also seems her association with Pornwikileaks had a pre-meditated agenda:

"Tara, webmaster of (NSFW), prefers the latter approach. "It would be better to sacrifice some people so everybody else can get on with it," said Tara, who declined to give her last name because her family doesn't know about her job. Extreme content producers, she said, "need to cool it, pull back a little bit" instead of "asking for it" during a right-wing administration."

I never would have imagined, that a woman - especially a black woman would have attempted to ruin my self view and experience in this world like this creature has.

Sadly her final tweets today on illustrate her fixation with me.

I'm moving on in life now - this is a battle I've won - however Tara Akinlose will forever be haunted by her deeds and by her thoughts. I'm glad. Life will be very difficult for her from this day forth, and I won't have to lift a finger in regards to the events that she will be dealing with - karma will take care of everything.

Wednesday, July 06, 2011

Monica Foster
I have quite a bit going on for the rest of the summer, so I've decided to put Monica Foster on summer hiatus unless there's a breaking news item or adult industry "emergency" of some other sort.

In the meantime catch my private webcam shows through links on and keep up with me

Learn about the porn industry on and - oh and of course pick up my book Getting Into Porn - the Handbook on

Saturday, July 02, 2011

Monica Foster interviews Digital Playground's newest and youngest contract girl and porn superstar on the rise, Bibi Jones.
Monica Foster and Bibi discuss her career, her interests, the adult entertainment industry and what you can expect from her in the near and far future!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

A new broadcast of Monica Foster at Home.

Monica Foster shares some information which has been reported by Mike South of on who has been found to be involved with the Pornwikileaks project. Monica also gives an update on Kacey Jordan aka Courtney Nicole.
Monica shares how she feels Misty Stone has a talent that reaches beyond the porn arena and shares her views on how she wishes more African American performers would make it known what they're up to career wise.
Lastly Monica shares her thoughts on Digital Playground's newest contract performer Bibi Jones and shares some information in regards to some online attacks she's dealt with, which were reported to her by Bibi's friend @MichaelLetts (as he's known on Twitter)

Sunday, June 26, 2011

This is the only SIGNED (signed on the back but I can sign it on the front as well upon request) Monica Foster skateboard deck in existence. If anyone would like to purchase this collectors piece, please drop me an email: monica at (put skatedeck in the subject line) - I'll take the best purchase offer.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

I was invited to do an interview this afternoon for The Static Hour on - it was fun :)

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Please view my latest update on how I've noticed Mallcom Inc / Jerry Aharony may be profiting from the Pornwikileaks venture which has terrorized myself, family and countless others.

Though I have much more certainty and clarity as to where I can go with my future from here, I've continued to have a rough time emotionally as of late due to the consistent harassment from those who operate the Pornwikileaks project (my stress and anxiety is off the charts and I still am in fear for my safety and life).

I have to say I'm very disappointed in much of humanity (especially people I considered my friends, aquaintences and peers) being that I've had very little assistance and support through this rather dark period of my life, but I suppose it's a lesson learned. Those who have been there for me - I will always consider true friends and I'm very grateful for their presence.

Today I had a bit of a bright spot - someone, who I've never met in person who attacked me apologized.

Here is the link to the video apology:

I'm really surprised by this turn around, and I'm also very impressed. This guy showed a lot of strength and thoughtfulness. In this situation and at this time of my life I really needed such a peace offering.

Monday, June 13, 2011

On this installment of Monica Foster at Home , I discuss the most recent news in the adult entertainment (porn) industry - specifically Cal-OSHA's decision to implement a condom mandate (condoms are now required for sexual intercourse within porn industry ).

I also discuss the currently known details in regards to Kacey Jordan and her alleged rape and departure from twitter. I go over how her entrance, exit and thought process while working within the adult entertainment industry (porn and escorting) is not an uncommon one and how I feel many young men and women are conditioned by the media (adult and mainstream) into having unrealistic expectations in the "real world" - and how the porn industry (and entertainment in general) readily exploits young individuals who are naive and harbor far too much trust in people who are essentially predators.

I inserted Kacey Jordan's final twitter videos and photos of the bloody bedsheets of her alleged rape (which happened in the Aria Hotel in Las Vegas) into this broadcast (courtesy of her twitvid and twitpic accounts).

Towards the end of the broadcast I discuss how though I'm glad safer sex practices are being implemented into the porn industry, I fear for countless young men and women who will be lured out of the country to work in over-seas porn markets (where condoms are not mandatory and few things are regulated at all in regards to sex workers). I discuss the link between human trafficking and porn and provide tips and warning signs as to how to keep your friends, family and loved ones safe from falling unwittingly into a world that they may not be prepared for.

I also note the currently missing Lauren Spierer and how often women with her appearance and stats who go missing wind up either trafficked out of the country or in the domestic sex industry without anyone noticing.

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Yesterday was a good day in Monica Foster Land.

As many of you who keep up with me are aware of - there has been a lot of debate and discussion within the adult entertainment and California legal/political arena as to whether or not condoms should be mandatory in the porn industry. Many of you know my views on the matter and FINALLY yesterday a conclusion (it may not be a permanent conclusion - but at least it is for now) was about it here:

Cal/OSHA advisors’ last public meeting on the adult film condoms issue

Mike South's take on the Cal-OSHA meeting

Yesterday's events, along with getting the chance to see an old friend of which I hadn't touched base with in a while, provided me with substantial conclusion and closure in regards to the past 3 years.

At this phase I feel very confident in moving forward in life, and I also feel that I'll receive a chance to regain certain opportunities and elements within my life of which I both lost and of which were essentially stolen from me.

At this point I have many enemies due to my choosing retaliation and retribution over "shutting up and walking away" - however I don't care, because throughout this journey I've learned not only that I have more strength than I was aware of, but that I'm a much better fighter than I'd ever imagined.

I've never been one to follow - I've also never been one to compromise. I'm an idealist (and can be a tad extreme in my views), however I'm always genuine and I speak and write from the heart (and of the truth as I know it).

At this phase I have a renewed sense of purpose and energy. I'm putting all of my time and energy into my uncompleted projects - mainly the character development of the many "off shoots" of "Monica Foster" - I hope that those of you who follow me, enjoy what I'll be manifesting between now and the end of the year.

I'll always look back at this stage of my life and remember that if you truly believe that something can happen, it will. I've learned that listening to yourself is the best option, because the Kingdom of God truly is within us all as both a united people and as individuals.

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

In the beginning of this installment of Monica Foster at Home, Monica shares another religious experience she had this morning in regards to God requesting that she return to the porn industry as a Christian adult actress / pornstar. Though she doesn't completely understand why God has prompted her to do this she doesn't question the path that she feels is set for her.

Later in the broadcast Monica Foster discusses today's press conference on CNN which featured Andrew Breitbart and Anthony Weiner. Monica shares her views as to why she feels the entire "scandal" was a minor issue which was blown out of proportion and questions why Breitbart took the actions against Weiner of which he did.

added note: Lenny Dykstra was arrested and jailed today :) Click here to read about it on the New York Times - karma is a bitch.....

Monday, June 06, 2011

Didn't expect to do a Monica Foster @ Home yesterday - but it was necessary.

Monica Foster gives a special report on some information Michael Whiteacre (producer of The Devil and Shelley Lubben) has recently brought to light on anti-porn Christian activist Shelley Lubben of the Pink Cross.
Monica shares her frustration in regards to the pro porn / anti-porn debate and relates how at this stage she is on neither side due to dealing with as much "Christian" harassment as she has porn industry harassment.
Monica speaks about how neither pro porn or anti-porn groups seem to get the point that they are 2 sides of the same coin which has serious flaws on each side.
At the end of the broadcast Monica Foster does a prayer / meditation session in effort for all the truths to finally come to light in relation to these issues and the people involved.

Friday, June 03, 2011

Decided to share a comment I made on adult industry blog today (here is a link to the post and comment thread):


Click here to read the comment which I've placed in the "Blog comments of Interest" section of my Monica Foster Official Blog.


A few added thoughts for the day:

If you're going to talk the talk, you have to walk the walk.
(I decided to start walking today)

Before anything is known, first it's unknown.

Fear of the unknown is rational, as long as you're willing to make the unknown, known.
(I have several fears, but being that I've made many things unknown to me known - I'm certain I'll be able to overcome all my present and future fears)

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

It's amazing how adversity and hardship can really ignite your creative juices...

A new friend of mine asked me recently what would be a good way to make some extra money - I thought that was an odd question coming from her (her name is Michelle by the way) considering that she's a woman of such high stature, but she explained to me that times are tough for EVERYONE right now.

I explained to Michelle that my field of expertise is VERY limited - all I really know how to do is webcam, write, create blogs and websites, create graphics, take awesome photographs, edit video and build computers. I suggested that maybe Michelle should start some sort of online broadcast about something along the lines of fashion or being a mom on the go and that I could help her with it, but to my surprise she wanted to try out being a sexy webcam model!

Well - I decided to let Michelle take over my account on Streamate from time to time on

I also set her up with a nice starter blog on

You can also catch her on - Who knows what she'll do from there...

Decided in July not to do an adult parody/character of Michelle Obama - reserving it for something non-adult industry. The real Michelle Obama deserves something better than this.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Click here for a list of people in porn I feel that you should avoid due to being a pimp, illegal drug dealer, connected to illegal drugs, unprofessional and/or being involved in other criminal activity.

In part 1 of this broadcast, Monica Foster discusses the recent developments in regards to the LA City council considering making condoms mandatory for the porn industry, Mercedes Ashley and her new project, the most recent FSC (free speech coalition) meeting of which details were shared in regards to the new porn industry network they are rolling out called the APHSS (adult performers health and safety services) her disappointment in Ryan Razor of accusing her of being behind the pornwikileaks project.

In part 2 of this broadcast Monica Foster discusses the history of the O.T.O. ( Ordo Templi Orientis ) , her views on the cult / organization, the organization's relationship to the porn industry and an experience she had in dealing with a group of their members.

Thank you @BooBooMatrix on Twitter for keeping up with what I've been sharing.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

So the harassment continues from the losers behind pornwikileaks. This is the email that was sent through the contact form of my building's website to my apartment manager - at least now I have someone local who can vouch for this crap from these psychotic people.
Hi ****

Here is a copy of the email we received. It came from the 'Contact Us' form from the building website.
From: MF (note how they inserted my email in the from field)
Subject: Franklin Park Apartments
To: (removed)
Date: Thursday, May 26, 2011, 12:35 PM

Below is the result of your feedback form. It was submitted by
MF ( on Thursday, May 26, 2011 at 15:35:07

Message: we have reason to believe (twitter comments) that *** in unit 118 is keeping several pets (birds, etc) in the apartment without paying the pet deposit of $250. she has just acquired a white dove and has tweeted several pictures of the animal.


I hate linking to their stupid site, but here's the thread link on PWL that initiated this:

You've Got to be kidding me - God sends me a dove (Phillip) and I took care of it and then released it. I have one little dog and another bird (a love bird) which my apartment manager has known about since I've lived in this building (since July of 2008). Luckily I live in a building with really good people who know what I've been dealing with since exiting the porn industry and speaking out.

When I think of all the stress, anxiety, pain and anguish that this has caused me and others - I want to scream but God is watching.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

When I first recorded this and reviewed it I thought that this broadcast was a bit - well for lack of better terms "out of the realm of understanding" for most - but though it is edited - it's actually not and it's exactly how I feel. Enjoy - and to my enemies - you made a huge mistake tonight.

After you watch this I suggest you get to know someone who affirmed to me that I'm fine being exactly as I am : Shirley MacLaine - here is a recent interview with her on Coast To Coast AM - it is excellent! Click here to listen (you probably have to be a member of the site to listen).

Monday, May 23, 2011

There's something I feel the need to address tonight in written form - especially considering the content of my most recent broadcast of

The issue tonight I will be addressing is rape. Lately I've been having recurring nightmares about this incident again - so I feel that God is telling me that it's time for me to share this.

New Years Eve (2008 into 2009) I was raped in a bathroom of a loft/condo off Hollywood and Vine by a man by the name of Chase. I pushed this incident into the back of my mind and never blogged about it here (there are actually MANY things I have not blogged about here out of fear, and out of the selfishness of wanting to build a long term career for myself within the porn industry), but I am today.

I was invited out by Scott David of X-play / All Media Play to a party at Ecco Lounge - where I had a really good time. Then afterwards we went to an afterparty at the residence of a guy by the name of Robert Quinn in a beautiful loft/condo building off Hollywood and Vine. I wound up getting drunk - incredibly intoxicated in fact that night and wound up talking to a guy by the name of Chase in the bathroom. He seemed nice, friendly, etc - and I let my guard down being that he was a black guy (I've never had any black / African American males be aggressive with me in life - at least not up until that point).

Chase was talking about his son, and showed me a photo of his son from his wallet - and I told him that I thought he had a cute kid. Then he asked me if I did privates. He specifically used the term "privates" (meaning escorting/prostitution). I told him that I was working as a porn actress currently. Not even 5 seconds later Chase had me on the floor and raped me. I didn't know what to do because I'd never been pinned down like that before. It only took about a minute and I went into a mental shock/black out mode - I didn't know what to think, how to react or even what to do. When he got off of me, I got up, left the bathroom, tried to act normal and told Scott David what happened.

Scott became really angry and attempted to fight Chase - I yelled at Scott to stop (because I just wanted to get out of there asap) and we left the party.

After that night I didn't want to think about the event and I pushed it to the back of my mind. I know now thinking back that I should have gone to the police and to the hospital but I didn't and I'll tell you why. Shame - I knew that in the eyes of the law and in the eyes of anyone (in my view at the time) I would be seen in a negative light - especially being that I had sex for living as a "pornstar". I didn't want the issue to come up in the relationship I was in at the time, and I didn't want it to get around in the "porn industry" that I wasn't easy going. I wanted to just let the whole thing go.

In time I started having nightmares about the incident. I contacted Jeff Mullen / Will Ryder and asked him for Chase's number (I wasn't sure whether his name was Chase or Chance). He gave it to me and I called Chase and screamed at him and told him he'd better not ever do anything along the lines of what he did to me to anyone else ever again - then I hung up the phone. He called me back but I didn't answer the phone. That was a pointless thing to do, but it's all I had the courage to do at the time.

Chase is a piece of shit with a mentality the unfortunately isn't too uncommon for jerks like himself who are on the fringes of the porn industry. I'm not sure exactly how or why Chase was at that party, I don't think he works for any porn studios (at least I'd never seen him on any of the sets I'd worked on before) but he somehow tight with Jeff Mullen and his friend Robert Quinn. Men like Chase figure that simply because a woman does porn, it's OK to be sexual with her anytime anyplace whether she likes it or not. I truly wonder how many other women Chase has done this to who felt like I did at the time - ashamed and afraid.

It's most likely to late to do anything about the incident now, but I would like to track this fucker Chase down and at least file a formal complaint against him of some sort - so I'm going to investigate how to do so. It sickens me that men in the porn industry such as Jeff Mullen and several others maintain friendships with men like Chase who feel that it's OK to violate a woman's body and space.

As my reaffirmed relationship with God and Jesus Christ grows and strengthens, and I as develop more internal strength and courage, and as my mind clears of the poisonous energy I picked up through my interactions with certain individuals within the porn industry - I'm realizing that it's imperative that I share my experiences and tell the truth about the events I witnessed and the situations I was in over the past few years - because it might save other young women and men from suffering the same fate as myself.

Tonight when I tweeted via twitter that I'm actively searching for the contact info of this Chase jerk so I can at least try to file some sort of legal complaint against him - Jeff Mullen immediately sent me text messages stating that I am a "liar" and that he's "disappointed in me" and that "he's one of the good guys" and that I'm being "unChristian".

I decided to post photos of the texts I received tonight because I'm sick of people calling me a liar nowdays when I am being honest, telling the truth and not holding back (which I feel is nearly killing me).

I strongly advise that if you're considering entering porn, or if you currently are a porn talent (or even if you are not in porn) DO NOT work with X-Play / All Media Play because apparently Jeff Mullen not only attempts to portray depictions of children having sex in his movies as I outline in this youtube video here - he also maintains friendships with men who think it's OK to sexually attack women just because they may be sex workers to begin with.

I suppose this is what happens when you just can't live a lie and withhold the truth anymore. Tonight I'm just going to pray to God and Jesus Christ my lord and savior that things in my life will work out however it is that God has planned for me. I have to retain faith. I feel like I'm being attacked from all directions at this phase, but I truly believe that God is standing with me, and I know for a fact that nothing and no one can triumph over God.

I'm documenting all of this because I feel like there needs to be a record incase someone out there decides to attempt to hurt me. I'm not overly afraid, but I am aware.

***Update 1: I found out tonight from someone on twitter ( @xxxVIP ) that "he answers to Black Shrek. He shows up late to parties to scrounge for rufee'd porn girls." - hopefully law enforcement or someone will be able to put a stop to not only Chase - but this trend in the porn / adult entertainment industry.

****Update 2: I found out that Chase uses the last name Styles or Stylez and DEFINITELY answers to "Black Shrek"