Well for those of you who keep up with the happenings in "Monica Foster Land", you know I've been in the news a bit lately. A part of me feels like "oh shit, should have made a different life choice once again", but another part of me knows that I did the right thing in speaking up, because though I personally am not looking any longer for anything of which I initially felt was owed to me a few days ago, I definitely saved countless women from falling prey to a true predator.

I may wind up with legal issues due to the tactics of which I took to ensure that Dykstra's days of conning escorts are over (or at least more widely known), but I feel that on a universal and spiritual level I quite possibly evened out a karmic embalance for myself and many other women who have taken a path similar to my own.

Since dealing with my current situation, I've found that many people within the adult entertainment circuit will become quite angry if your actions don't fall in line with their agendas. I've been asked to post the bounced check in regards to my current situation online on a certain adult industry forum. Initially I would have if I had a copy in my possession (I have to wait to receive a copy from my bank at this stage - the particular bank I have an account with doesn't provide you with an online scan when you cash it directly with a teller), but after rethinking the situation...absolutely not. I will only be posting my proof on my own venues or via a mainstream news source.

Interestingly since the individuals who moderate that particular forum haven't gotten their way, their true colors have shone through. The mainstream media has labeled me as a "hooker" yes - it's a harsh term but I can deal with it. In contrast however, a few within the porn arena have decided to let their true confederate flag flying nature show (of which I've written about in the past on my blog http://gettingintoporn.blogspot.com) and have called me a "nigger", "black bitch", etc - oh and of course posting various photos of monkeys and labeling them as "Monica Foster" as well (as I've said in the past, if you're a black considering entering porn - please wait till I open my own ethnic content studio before coming out to LA - too many KKK rejects are running loose in porn valley as of current, and much of the ethnic populace here is too intimidated to speak up about it).

People who I thought had similar views to myself (and simple common sense) have turned on me. It's very telling, and disappointing - especially being that it's been revealed to me who really owns and runs the adult industry's most controversial online discussion forum ( yep the one that gives porn stars real names and addresses if they don't follow the owners' agenda of creating a "new world order" in porn).

If this particular forum continues to attack me (as silly and childish as the attacks are) I will provide the name of who really runs it (and it really is not who most people think it is...you'll be as shocked as I was to find out - though in many ways it makes perfect sense)- But then again I may not have to, the 2 individuals who informed me have much more reason to out the names than I do.

LOL.

One thing I've learned over the past year, is that in our society, women like me are consistently silenced and labeled as "dumb", "a loudmouth", "too outspoken", a "man-hater", "a slut", etc. I suppose on some level all of those labels fit, but guess what? I'm just the first major wave of such a woman. I will not back down, I'm not afraid of pain, I will not be silenced, I will continue to live independently, I will continue to set my own price/worth, I will continue to enjoy sex with hot men (of my choosing) and I will not ever give up on my dreams, ambitions or goals.

The most shocking part of having worked in porn and the world of adult entertainment was to learn that it's many of the individuals (specifically certain men) who work behind the scenes who are most threatened by women such as myself. I think mainstream America in actuality is much more prepared and ready to embrace the "type of woman" that I am (because the numbers of women like me are rapidly growing) , then the adult industry, which is who has the real problem with women like me.

The false image the porn industry creates (which in reality is nothing more than a controlled "doll"), which they own and portray as being a "free sexual spirit and self possessed" has been outed as a sham at this stage. Really take a good look at the lives of MANY of the "adult star's" images you see splashed all over adult trade mediums and pranced around at conventions...really LOOK - the facade of success, wealth & security these adult actresses display quite often is totally false and is manufactured by their "keepers" behind the scenes . Porn videos are not the true money maker of the "porn industry" - it's the activity that I'm currently being condemned for that's the true cash cow for many in adult entertainment.

It's the uncontrollable independent women of which the porn industry truly fears and encourages America to fear, because without that fear, the adult entertainment industry wouldn't still be trucking along (though it's currently rolling down the road with at least 2 flat tires).

Actually the adult entertainment industry would make far more in the future and have less of a stigma attached to its female talents using the image of a woman who embodies qualities similar to my own, but it would take a population of women behind the scenes for that to happen. Unforunately these beta males currently running the show aren't going to disappear until they are forced too (or just die off). Why, because they're like drug addicts, and their "drug of choice" is the small population of adult industry actors and actresses of which they currently hold under their thumb (I'll explain more in my next blog).

So all in all though my holiday was tainted by me taking an unforeseen side trip down a path I hadn't imagined I'd ever experience, other elements of my holiday worked out well. I visited with my wonderful mother, sister and nephew. In a couple of months I will make an effort to visit with my father too (we connected via phone this holiday and I shared with him lots of photos and video i took with my phone).

I decided to repaint and decorate my nephews room while visiting. It was hard work but worth it (plus drinking wine while painting is always fun). It's amazing that regardless of what life throws at you, when you reconnect with where you originate from - nothing else seams nearly as important as you may have initially thought it was.

So to conclude, I feel the rest of this year and 2011 will be great! I've learned more in the past 2 years than many learn in a lifetime. Ive sesen so much and done so much...and I'm just getting started....

Don't miss the live broadcast of www.monicaathome.com on December 27th at 10pm pst :)

Sometimes in life we make mistakes. Other times we're simply too trusting. Regardless none of use deserve to be treated like crap by people who believe their better than others or "entitled" to whatever they want because they are or were wealthy.

I'm standing up for myself and other women who have found themselves in my situation in this video.



Never be afraid to speak up and fight back. You messed with the wrong woman Lenny Dykstra!

Well it appears that the person who screwed me over financially either doesn't have enough respect for others to pay me what he owes me, OR he simply doesn't have the money. Regardless I'm going public with this because I'll be damned if this asshole jerk cons any other women.

I invite you all to read http://lenny-dykstra.blogspot.com/

I've kept me mouth shut about many things on many occasions but I will not in regards to this situation and individual. I know I may be possibly incrimnating myself by coming forward and speaking up about what happened on Deceber 13th, 2010 but I have nothing to lose at this point being that my holiday has been ruined.

Be careful of who you fuck over in life people - sometimes the least likely of people will be the ones who rip your head off. No one is more dangerous than someone who has nothing left to lose and now, I'm in debt and have no holiday. Lenny Dykstra - suffer my wrath.

2011 is just around the corner and I'm very excited! I know that this year will be GREAT because I'm going to make it great.

I haven't written a blog in quite some time, mainly due to my other projects being as time consuming as they are - so here's an update.

*My first book Getting Into Porn - The Handbook (which is available on Amazon.com) is doing very well. Simply completing it and managing to put it out there for sale was an accomplishment in itself and a fantastic way to conclude 2010. My next book Getting Into Porn - The Journeys (well, more like the first installment in the series) is nearing completion and I will most likely look into turning it into a screenplay mid 2011.

*My little broadcast www.MonicaAtHome.com is doing well too! I have a few surprises of which I'll be implementing into the show in 2011 so keep watching.

*I'm working on a joint venture with comedians Thomas Ward and Brittany Blaze. I rarely am willing to work with others on much of anything, but these to individuals are so talented, that I feel it would be a huge mistake not to create something wonderful with them.

*This is an odd point to make, but I recently bought some bindis, and will be sporting them this year :)

*I'm in the process of revising my script for the first adult feature/parody I hope to be able to release 7/7/2011. All I need now is the capital to get production rolling.

*On a negative note, someone who I thought initially was trustworthy has attempted to rip me off. I'm pretty upset about this being that it's heavily effected my holiday plans, but I have a feeling that the power of the internet will assist me in getting back what I'm owed. The person only has 24 hours before I name them and they have much more to lose than I.

So that's about it. I feel great and if you check my last www.MonicaAtHome.com broadcast I look great as well :) I'm heading back to Florida for Christmas in a couple of days. It will be nice to see my family, however I will be very glad to get back to California to continue my work, and life.

I've learned quite a bit this year - about myself, about others and about how the world really works. Since learning certain key life elements, I find myself waking up in the morning (or evening - depending upon what sleep schedule I'm on at the time) with a zest for life like I've never had in the past. I actually wish I never had to sleep at times (unless it's with a sexy 21 year old who looks like Justin Timberlake of course) and I'm much more accepting of myself and others who I feel are worth it.

I no longer feel guilt when it comes to telling people who are not worth it to get the fuck out of my life and not to bother me anymore. I had to do yet another "cleaning house" of my social circle recently. I do give people chances, but if they can't (or won't) get it together I will not expend my energy on them any more.

I've come to realize that I'm a "certain type" of woman. As of current I have to define myself as a "Single Swinger" - yea yea, I know that sounds weird, but it's who I am. I wish I'd realized that about myself actually prior to entering the adult entertainment world - but actually when I think about it, maybe the adult entertainment world is what helped me in discovering certain qualities within myself of which I was initially afraid of embracing.

A good friend of mine, Julie Meadows, touches on certain annoying things that anti-porn activist Shelley Lubben preaches - one of those phrases being "You were meant for more than porn". I think that's an interesting statement, because it's all about perspective.

What is "more" than porn? What is "less" than porn?

Another good friend of mine Brittany Blaze brought up an interesting point to me when we were discussing my book on video for her youtube channel. I brought up my thoughts about how I feel you need to enter the porn industry with a financial "cushion" or a bit of money saved in case things don't work out - and she countered with that for many women - entering the porn industry is one of their ONLY options for survival and that is a girl is coming from "the boonies with brown teeth getting fucked in her ass everyday by her dad", that a decent looking guy offering her $1000 to do the same thing is like hitting the lottery for the girl.

I hate to say it, but I agree with Brittany, and if you look closely at a few of the "top" performers in the porn industry - they truly were once the girl the Brittany described (whether they want to admit it or not).

I've come to realize that in life I've been a bit "spoiled". Not in every regard - but due to my background, personal taste, and methodical way of thinking, I've tended to be able to always put myself into situations of which I can walk on the wild side, but have the luxury of experiencing only the mildest aspects of the wild arenas. My life has been difficult in some ways, but really never that bad - I'm quite fortunate.

If I'd known more about acceptably open relationships and lifestyles (but how could I have being that it's more of a west coast thing from what I can observe), I probably never would have done porn. Porn really was just a venue for me to be more of an exibitionist than I already was, fuck a lot (I hadn't fucked much prior to doing porn in all honesty) & lay some ground work to make some money.

I admitted to my Dad in an email recently that I think I require 100 times more attention than most people. I personally don't think anything's wrong with embodying that quality, because we're all different...but one thing I do know now is that due to me needing so much consistent interaction with the opposite sex, at this stage of my life I most likely can't be in a single monogamous relationship (and frankly I DON'T WANT TO BE). I'm reaching my peak psychologically, mentally and sexually as a woman and I feel that I need about 12 boyfriends in order satisfy my needs - in other words a "reverse harem".



12 would be a perfect number of men for me because I could see each 2 to 3 times a month without the relationship with any of them ever growing stale (at least not for about 7 to 8 months). Ideally I'd like to find a group of men of varying ages and ethnicities - however I'd prefer for at least 6 of the men to be around 21 years old and REALLY cute (as I'm approaching 32 years old, I'm starting to understand VERY well why older men date women as young as they can get away with dating - Just call me black Demi Moore).

Yea, it's POSSIBLE there is ONE man out there who has the strength of 12 men (I personally believe it's Theo Theodoridis), but I haven't met him yet.

Well that's about it, I need to get back to work now recruiting for my reverse harem and continuing to progress my other projects. See you on December 27th on www.BlogTV.com/People/MonicaFoster for the next live broadcast of www.MonicaAtHome.com

Check out my latest broadcast of Monica @ Home (www.MonicaAtHome.com)

Doesn't my hair look pretty :)

I'm feeling great!

Another new broadcast of Monica @ Home (www.MonicaAtHome.com)

On this broadcast I discuss the recent closure of AIM by California (Los Angeles) health officials, Derrick Burts (aka Cameron Reid aka Derrick Chambers), my views on adult and mainstream talent agent's responsibilities to who they represent (their clients) and my new book Getting Into Porn - The Handbook which is available on Amazon.com

Well, here's my first "mainstream" role in a short film by director, actor and comedian Thomas Ward of www.Twardcomedy.com

A special Monica Foster @ Home (www.MonicaAtHome.com) - I share thoughts on Derrick Burts (aka Cameron Reid aka Derrick Chambers) latest stance on condoms being mandatory in porn since he's contracted HIV.

Another new broadcast of Monica @ Home (www.MonicaAtHome.com)

Another Monica @ Home (www.MonicaAtHome.com)