I'm single again, but before I get to that let me backtrack:

I've probably been overworking myself over the past week or so. Why? Because the only thing I want in life is to find success on some level and in some capacity. I don't feel I've found it or achieved it yet, but I have faith that eventually I will.

I'm going to slow it down to a few notches above a comfortable pace though due to the advice of Miss Christy Canyon who I had the pleasure of meeting Friday afternoon when I had the opportunity to meet her and be a guest on Playboy Radio's "Night Calls" on Sirus Radio.

I have a lot of admiration for her being that she's braved the porn world, survived and has found a place to continue within the adult industry outside of performing. I'm not sure how the interview came across (I always am such an anxious and nervous wreck when I'm out of my element aka my apartment), but regardless I had a good time.

I thought her insight and comments were interesting - particularly when I mentioned how prior to getting into porn I was naive enough to believe the "Jenna Jameson - E True Hollywood Story" - I actually do still believe that documentary which airs on the E-channel every now and then because it is true - it is true for Jenna, just not for every woman who gets into the porn industry.

I suppose the reason I felt her comments were interesting was because she touched on how women who feel that embarking into the porn industry can ultimately find success in the mainstream entertainment world. Well evidently a very few select few can but it's a long shot. Jenna did - everyone in "mainstream world" most likely first thinks of "Jenna Jameson" when they think of porn, and I hate to say this, but Christy Canyon - hosting a show on Playboy Radio does indeed mean that you have achieved mainstream status. I'm proud of you and you are an excellent role model for a woman like myself.

I haven't touched on this due to my innate sadness, but I'll just type a quick comment on Michael Jackson's passing on:

I am very saddened by it, but I'm also OK with it, because I don't feel death is the end. We're not meant to be on earth forever - it's just a spiritual phase from my perspective. Many have said that he died without him fully rectifying himself. Big deal - MANY of the greatest entertainers and people and people have died in what superficially weren't the best circumstances in relation to the mark they've made - Elvis Presley, Josephine Baker, Mozart, Jesus Christ, etc (all of which I admire but aren't from my generation as Michael Jackson & Farah Fawcett, who coincidentally died on the same day, have been). It's the nature of artists and the greatest influentially people. They're put here to make a mark on and change our society, their craft, and the world. I have a feeling the Michael Jackson's spirit is continuing and rocking on, on a great path, a path that we as humans can't even imagine or wrap our minds around, and he's survived by his offspring. It's OK.

I was a huge MJ fan - not his number 1 fan I'm sure, I never wrote him a fan letter and I never had the chance to meet him in person (though I'd have liked to), but his music and being definitely shaped who I am today.

I had to let go of someone I deeply love today. Being that he didn't put up much of a fight I know it was the right thing to do. I will miss him more than I miss Florida, more than I miss my childhood bedroom, more than I miss most things and people I no longer have or have contact with. Maybe we'll be friends, maybe we won't. I don't know... All I know is that he is the best man I've known as of yet aside from my father.

You know the saying that goes something like:
"When you love something (or someone) you should let it (or them) go and if it (of they) stays it's (or they are) yours, if it (or that person) goes, it (or they) were never yours to begin with."

It's a hurtful experience, that's for sure, but it's all part of growing, evolving and ultimately LIVING.

This has been one hell of year, not just for me, but for everyone in the country and on earth. The great thing about time, is that it never stops. That's why I don't either - well I suppose I should really say that I never give up on my dreams - makes me a silly, overly romantic and overly idealistic woman, but hey, we all have faults.

I suppose the point of experiencing life and time is to do something positive and productive with it and ENJOYING it rather than wasting it and letting it go without doing a damn thing.

So I'm single again - DAMN. I'm not even going to know what to do with myself... Here's 2 videos. The first by Vinen and the 2nd by Trina (another South Florida black girl) - they don't exactly define my feelings but what hell - they're appropriate:

I will probably be uploading the framework to www.GettingIntoPorn.com tomorrow afternoon. All of the links will not be active yet, but the site should be about complete (FINALLY) by the end of the month. The site's purpose isn't to encourage or discourage anyone to take the path into the world of porn performance - it's simply a FREE resource to educate individuals (primarily women) looking to get their start in porn as a performer and to act as a central hub for all the adult industry info a person could possibly need before "getting into porn".

I remember when I first was looking for info on the porn industry I found only a few adult industry "behind the scenes" news resources and only a few adult industry forums. I scoured sites like AVN and Xbiz and checked a few adult industry blogs but I wasn't able to find the type of info that I know as of current and am putting together on GettingIntoPorn.com - I really wish I'd have been able to find a resource like I'm putting together prior to my start in the biz.

I'll tell you, one of the best adult industry resources I've viewed (actually after I'd begun shooting scenes) were the "Porn 101" and "Porn 102" videos which are available on the AIM website. The videos tell women (and men) looking to get into porn a lot of valuable info, but truthfully at this point AIM needs to step it up and produce a "Porn 103" video because there's quite a bit of info that hasn't been touched on in the current videos.

Speaking of AIM needing to "step it up", at this point considering everything that we know scientifically about HIV and the incubation period, WHY is the quarantine period for adult industry talents who have had sexual contact with other talents who then test HIV positive only a period of about a month (28 days I believe) rather than 3 to 6 months? According to ABOUT.com and many other resources such as STDresource.com, the facts of HIV the incubation period can be about 3 to 6 months (if not longer) where as an infected person can test negative but still be a carrier for all of that time? I think that since AIM's mission is to protect adult industry performers, they need to increase this quarantine window and possibly set up an offshoot organization that employs individuals in quarantine so that they can get by financially while they wait to find out their STD status.

Being that AIM is currently the primary testing facility for the Porn community,and being that the name's of the individuals currently in quarantine aren't public knowledge (the only individual I know of who's come out about his involvement is Seth Dickens and apparently if he tests negative he's looking to get back to performing ASAP according to his statement) there's no way at all that I could possibly in my right mind work as a talent in the next few months - too much of the equivalent of walking in the dark through a live landmine.

I actually don't see how ANY talent is comfortable shooting scenes at present with the lack of public information as to this current HIV issue in the porn industry. I'll go out on a limb here and state that most likely the only reason any talents are continuing to perform right now is because they:

1) haven't been told what is currently going on
2) haven't been educated as to how each individual in porn is only 2 to 3 degrees of seperation from one another.
3) aren't aware as to how the incubation period of HIV is 3 to 6 months

I understand that performing in a porn IS a risk, and that taking the risks of getting an STD is a part of the business, but considering what's happening right now with this HIV issue (which is obviously very serious considering that in LA county the public health department is offering FREE HIV testing till Saturday in various locations), all of this "mess" could be avoided if condoms were used more regularly in scenes. When I perform in the future, condom use will definitely be something that will be in place.

Tomorrow will be an interesting afternoon. I'm booked to be on Playboy Radio's "Night Calls", hopefully I won't be too nervous and will lots to discuss with the shows hosts and callers :)

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Well I had a fun night last night - it was a good friend of mine's birthday party and a welcome diversion from the stress and anxiety of the week. I'm very fortunate to have made friends out here in LA that are far removed from the adult entertainment industry. Keeps me halfway down to earth and at least one quarter of the way based in "reality".
Everytime I hang out with this particular friend of mine, who is naturally very musical, she inspires me to keep practicing on my guitar. I play a bit of piano but guitar has been a bit of a challenge - what I love most about the instrument though is that it's easily portable and a great ice breaker and way to bring people together - oh and of course, I love the sound - an acoustic guitar even if played badly never actually sounds that bad :)
Today I spent some time organizing some paperwork, doing laundry and just resting (oh yea, my life is so exciting and sexy - not). I'll be on webcam tonight and most of tomorrow - oh come to think of it tomorrow afternoon will be another busy day as I'm helping a friend of mine move into her new apartment. I never have an issue with helping a friend move because considering all the moving I've had to do solo in the past, I'd do anything to help any of my friends avoid the stress and physical hardship (especially when stairs are involved).

It's been a while since my last post, but due to this week being pretty uneventful and mellow, there hasn't been too much reason to write.

Last weekend was Erotica-LA, and being that it was my first adult industry convention ever (I've never even attended a convention as a patron before), I feel that my experience there was very good and completely free of drama. Below are some photos of me at the HarleysXXXtv booth.






I really enjoyed meeting some of my website's Club Monica members and it felt good to have people request my autograph and to have their photo taken with me. Yes, I have realized that I am indeed a bit of an "attention whore", but I have it under control :) Plus I believe that everyone should have that "hey look at me, I'm so great" experience at least once in their life.

This week is just all about webcam shows, but next week it looks like I have a couple non-adult acting gigs so that should be interesting. I'm anticipating that by August I'll be beginning shooting on my first adult video project as a writer/director so stay tuned :)

Tomorrow (well more like today being that it's already past midnight) I'll be at my first adult industry convention/expo Erotica-LA . I've been pretty busy over the past few days getting ready for the event. If you'd like a bit of a visual as far as how thorough and amazingly anal I am when it comes to getting ready for any (what I consider major) event just think back to that Reese Witherspoon movie "Election", when Reese's character wakes up at around 4am to make cupcakes, posters, etc for the first day of campaigning for her class's student government election - I say that half in jest and half in dead seriousness.

Over the past few days I've been printing labels and creating the media content for my Exclusive Limited Edition Monica Foster CD ROM business cards, putting my outfits together for the convention and the Harleys XXX TV Post Erotica LA after party, I redid my hair extentions, sent out my press releases, posted my appearance info and schedule on my website and myspace pages, picked up my porn DVDs to sell and sign, promoted my appearance at the Erotica LA event on my webcam shows, and the list goes on and on.

Contract stars and other big adult industry names have a guy or team of people to do all of this for them...I on the other hand have to do it all myself. It's rewarding, yet stressful and tiring.

Tomorrow in the morning I still have to stop at CVS to pick up a few things and then find my way to the convention center. Thank god for GPS. However once I arrive I have to check in and find my way to the booth I'll be signing in. I suppose the best part of the day will be to finally get a chance to say "hello" to my friends and fans and thank them for taking the time to watch me.

Oh, below is a pic of the CD cards I made. This is just a sample one - the actual ones have a login and password for a 3 month membership to my website (50 of them) which come to think of it, I still need to enter into the admin area of my website. The work never ends...

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Just a note to let you all know I'll be on webcam the entire weekend and on niteflirt I'm running a weekend $1.99 per min special - usually the price is between $2.99 and $3.99 so here's your chance to see me at an economy friendly rate!

Today I was browsing the internet checking out other new "interracial porn" releases and and something suddenly hit me - maybe I was simply enlightened - who knows, but here was my thought:

Considering the day and age we live in and the amazing progress that America (and the english speaking world for the matter) has made over the past 200 years or so, and our current political leader especially, the country needs to end the "racial classification" system at this point once and for all and we all just need to be Americans. The term "interracial" is stupid at this point - we're all fucking human.

When you go to France, everyone there is "French" , when you go to Brazil, everyone there is Brazilian (and please keep in mind that a Brazilian can have blond hair and blue eyes or be as black as I am) so what the hell is America's problem? What the hell is the porn industry's problem with their constant attempt to fetishize people with different skin tones having sex? It's STUPID. I actually hate to say it but "Not the Cosbys XXX" raunchily but clearly illustrates that yes, ALL people of all shades AND cultural economic backgrounds CAN and WILL and DO have sex at some point and it doesn't have to be via stereotypical scenereos.

What EXACTLY dictates someone being black or white or whatever now days anyways? Take a look at the photo below: those 2 kids come from the same parents but one is darker than the other, are you gonna tell me that they some how are not equal? If you didn't know what their parents looked like how would YOU classify these kids? COULD you classify them?



How in the hell can someone be LATIN with latin is a language base? Why are all asians lumped together when there's such a wide spectrum of people from the asiatic area of the world?

I'll tell you this, the very SECOND that extraterrestrial contact is made, no one will be black, white, yellow, red, or whatever anymore - we'll all be earthlings so listen up readers of this blog - get with the times now and stop buying racial specific porn. Stop checking a box as to what race you are on forms.

Upon entering the porn biz I was all hung up on being a "black girl" in porn - why? Because the idiots who run the show want to put me in the "black girl box". Why are girls like Misty Stone and Cassidy Clay who in my opinion both appear MULTIRACIAL boxed into being "black girls". Why are girls like Shay Jordan (aka Jannine Jinn) and Tera Patrick NOT classified as being "ethnic" when they're clearly not primarily "european". Why does DJ Snoop have to be a "black" performer when he's clearly multi-ethnic? It's so rediculous at this point.

The REAL problem with porn right now is that it's so stuck in the "old mindset" - the only progress that I and some others I frequently speak to in the biz see is the return of HUMOR into this business via this new flood of parodies. Someone very close to me recently told me that when he first began working in the biz it was a lot more fun and there was a lot more humor. Humor is the basis of positivity in my opinion - if you can't smile and laugh there's no point in living. I think when a lot of pornographers who are just based in negativity and evil started producing SHIT that degrades and in many cases HURTS women, it probably brought a shit load of negative and bad kharma into the industry which is why it's having a hard time economically right now.

Here's my suggestion to pornographers: Cut the crap. Stop the shitty gonzo. Stop with the "black porn, white porn, latin porn, asian porn and interracial porn" generas. Big porn companies, don't be afraid of throwing a brown face in your productions - when you don't it's VERY obvious. Start classifying porn as to it's content and not the COLOR of the actors - oh and by the way - put some fucking EFFORT into your productions for once. Just cause you have a high def camera and decent editing does NOT mean that your porn is good. Write a god damn storyline and make it GOOD - it's really NOT that difficult.

I will be starting a porn movie review site soon and I am going to REALLY review these flicks that are supposedly OH SO GREAT, cause guess what - most of them ain't.

Here's an interesting article I found today called "Dating 101: Dealing With the Race Factor - what's wrong with mixing?"- definitely worth a read.

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Not too much to report in regards to the weekend - just have been VERY busy with my private webcam shows and website projects - which is a great thing :)

This Tuesday (June 2nd), my first adult feature movie, "Not the Cosby Show XXX", will finally be released. I'm pretty interested in how the flick will be received. I have a feeling some will be "insulted" while others will "get it" - all depends on the viewer's IQ level I suppose.

You can pre-order a copy from Adult DVD Universe by clicking the boxcover below, OR you can request an Autographed Copy from me for $40 by clicking here :)