One thing working in the adult entertainment industry has taught me, is that I'm a very valuable person. Everyone is a valuable person, but sometimes when your worth is shown to you in actual dollars and cents, it's easier to realize.

When I was younger, I went through a phase of low self esteem and self worth, which made me very prone to entering abusive relationships. I went through my fair share of such relationships, but fortunately I realized what was going on before it ever got to be "too late" and I left those relationships. None of my abusive relationships were ever physical (well one was but when the man tried to hit me I knocked the shit out of him - I'm pretty tough), they were psychologically/verbally abusive which can be just as bad.

Currently I know a few women in abusive relationships - 1 a family member, and 2 are friends. My nature is to want to "save" people, so believe me, I've tried my best to show these women what's happening from my perspective, but of course, none of these women want to listen. It's sad, pathetic, but it's their choice - however I've decided not to be a "shoulder to cry on" or a "support system", because what I've found is that some women thrive on the negativity that their abuser creates in their life - it's an attention thing and I want no part of such a disfunctional mindset.

Men who are or try to be psychologically abusive or dominant in an unhealthy way are very weak and insecure in my eyes. I recently realized that someone I thought I could trust out here in Los Angeles is attempting to be a little mentally abusive with me - so I've decided to distance myself from this person. Whether this dude is doing so concously or unconciously, all I have to say is this:

If you're intimate with a woman and by all definitions date her, but can't/won't call her your "girlfriend" to your friends and/or family after several months and don't bring her into your social circle/life, and only want to see her when it's conveiniant to you - then you are a selfish, self serving and just overall bad man. It shows that it's "OK" to you to treat her like she's not "good enough", an activity, a hobby or a toy - and that's a form of abuse. If you want to treat a woman as I've just described, then you should hire an escort - at least that way the woman is compensated monetarily for your shitty behavior and the terms of the relationship are clear.

Regardless of how strong a woman, or man may seem - that individual still has emotions and deserves to have their emotions and feelings respected.

Yesterday was a LOOOOOOONNNNNNGGGGGGGG day. The night before I didn't get much sleep due to some personal/family matters, but I managed to get just enough to function as I had a B/G scene booked. The studio I worked with was Reality Kings - I like this company. They were the 2nd studio I ever worked with (in an adult entertainment capacity) and they're very professional and cool.
The scene I shot was a parody of a scene from the movie "SuperBad" - looks like between this and "Flava of Lust" I'm the parody porn queen :) Though the setup for the scene took a while to shoot, the entire crew was a ton of fun and I had a blast.
I had to drive home like a mad woman though in order to change and make it to the premier of "Pirates 2". I wound up getting there a bit late and didn't get to have my photo taken on the red carpet but that was ok. I walked down it anyways. That event was like a circus - I saw people like I've never seen before. I didn't really know anyone there and after socializing a bit decided I was way too sleepy to sit through an entire movie, so after seeing people and hopefully being seen I made my way back to my car, back into Hollywood, and back into my super soft bed to go to sleep.
Today I hope to just relax and have some fun. I had a great week, but I'm exhausted.

Whew, what a day - I'm sooooo tired, but I figured that since I had such a good day, I should write a blog about it before going to bed.
Today I had an adult vid booking with a studio called Black Ice for an upcoming DVD called Milf Chocolate 3. Once again I gotta say that I LOVE the vibe that's on the majority of the porn sets - chill, laid back, easy going and enjoyable. Everyone from the director, to the camera man to the male talent I worked with today was great. Once again I've fallen in love with another makeup artist - I'd have to say by far that this beautiful and cool young woman, Kristy, is the BEST makeup artist I've EVER worked with! Along with making me look fantastic she turned me on to that new HBO series "true blood". Check out the show's site: http://www.hbo.com/trueblood/
Here's a pic of the me, the makeup job and the super-artist Kristy - weird angle, looks like I have a double chin (normally I don't - lol).

The shoot took a little extra time, but it went very well. After a long day of adult video work nothing hits the spot like a Jack In the Box combo. Today I had a bacon onion burger and curly fries. Yum.
Since I'm going to be hitting the red carpet at that Digital Playground Pirates 2 premiere tomorrow I figured I'd better get a nice dress to wear, so I hit the mall with my good friend Sophie (you probably know her as Sophie Perez from Teen Idol 5). First we tried BCBG - nice clothes but WAY overpriced. Also not quite flashy enough for me.
I wound up finding a really sexy, yet classy cream colored sheeth in a store called BlackJack. I gotta go back and get an Ed Hardy sweater dress from there later next week.
Well I'm beat, so g'nite peeps.

Well, it's Wednesday, this middle of the week. I swear - the time FLIES out here in Los Angeles - I feel as if time moves about 3 times faster out here than it does in back in Florida.

Earlier this week I decided to take a new photo set for my casting photos - below is one of my favorites (so far I've gotten some great props on them):



This Saturday I get to do something fun - the premier of the sequal to Digital Playground's movie "Pirates" is coming up and I get to go - that will be my first official movie premier that I get to attend. I feel like a real Californian now :)

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It takes a lot to really push me over the edge, but this morning when checking my "Monica mail" I decided that enough was enough in regards to a certain psychotic "fan" aka "email stalker" who's decided to fixate on me.

This idiot who likes to call himself "Darius Rucker" via his email name (and I'm certain that it's not the dude from Hootie and the blowfish), at least once every few weeks likes to read my blog and then send me insulting emails as to what a loser/screw up/fuck up I am. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but I've decided to start posting this idiot's emails to me along with the person's email address so that you, the reader can respond personally to what HE (or possibly SHE) thinks about me.


What is the topic? Fan Mail
What is your email? overheight1@yahoo.com
What is your name?
What is your message? Initially when I came into the business I wanted to be a contract girl for a studio like Vivid, Wicked, Digital Playground or Adam and Eve - well the only reason that didn't happen is because of 1 thing (and it's not my age, or my looks or my fucking and sucking ability): I'm a dark skinned black girl.

"They won't let me in because I'm black"
"I really want Tracy Bingham's role in Baywatch"

Monica,I've been an entrprenuer. So are you. If there is money to be made doing something, it could be having monkey jumping out of your ass, someone will find a way to do it and sell it. It's called simple demand side economics.
you're just fucked up dear. Sadly, you may be talented in other areas. But you are truly a fuck up. but your thoughts are interesting to follow.
I await your latest diatribe.

As an update to this posting, for those of u out there who aren't aware, there's such a thing as an "IP address" lookup - it's a really cool thing to do on the internet when you want to figure out who is sending you junkmail, stalker mail, psychotic cracked out email - etc.

As I initially suspected, the weirdo who sent me the above email, and many others in the past (and who ironically in a previous email stated that they wouldn't contact me anymore even though apparently they still ARE considering that the above posting is from this morning) is someone who I've had verbal contact with.

The IP address lookup pointed me to the Baltimore, MD location which again narrows down my list of suspects (Yes, I'm a good detective - tech savvy baby - BBS days). Now upon checking my email again later tonight, I received yet ANOTHER psychotic email from this fool which I may post if they continue - mainly so that there's a record of this person in case anything weird happens to me.

All in all, this person and people in general who actually take the time to write negatively to someone they don't know are pathetic. Not only am I mis-quoted by this person, but I'm also overly fixated upon. Scary. This person I think may even have problems reading and comprehending things properly (which is even more sad) because points they made about my bio didn't even make sense - in the latest email the person wrote something about me being a psychologist - um, I don't even have a degree and I admit to be a drop out. Ridiculous. Oh well, when u have "haters" at least you know you're doing well. I'll write about my shoot I did today tomorrow. It rocked!

If you'd like to see who I worked with just click here for Mahlia Millian. Very pretty and nice young lady.

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Today was a busy, productive and unexpected day. A couple days ago I called Caveman, star of "Flava of Lust" (the last XXX porn title that I'm featured in) to let him know that the title is in the stores - since I hadn't seen him in a while we decided to meet up today to discuss some ideas I have for his self marketing plan (so of course I brought my video camera).

We wound up having a cool afternoon - grabbed some lunch and then hit Caveman's lab aka music studio so that I could check out his tracks, freestylin and to record a quick "Monica Foster eXclusive" interview.

I'm not done editing the entire interview but here's something I threw together for those of you who just can't get enough of my world :)

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Well it's Wednesday and my week's gotten off to a great start. All my bills are paid, and my creative juices are flowing overtime. Today I need to edit the photos from the last pictorial of myself that I shot. I'll post a sample pic on this blog entry later - I'm getting damn good with lighting :)
Today I'm planning on re-shooting and editing the intro video for my website. I'm excited to get some feedback as to some of the changes I'm making to my website.

Wow, I thought Miami was a city full of hustlers - wrong. The amount of scammers in Miami is not at all CLOSE to how many low-life , yet surprisingly sophisticated hustlers there are out here in the Hollywood/Los Angeles area - it's absolutely amazing. Here, you have to be VERY careful (of which I am) about who you share ANY ideas with, because a lot of people are DESPERATE to do ANYTHING or step on ANYONE to make it.
I'm really grateful for the fans that I've earned along this "Monica Foster" journey. Why? Well, mainly because they know what I'm really about and the real me. Lately I've had a flood of interest and new fans due to my xxx porn video releases, which is great, but what I find so odd is that many of them really can't believe that it really has been me who's taken some of my own best photos (via my interval timer attached to my camera) and me who's maintained my website.
I guess it's just hard to believe that someone really can be attractive and have a bit of a brain.
Yesterday was very productive. Did some cam shows, cleaned my bathroom, worked on my website, bathed my dog, then did some more cam shows.
Tomorrow here's what's on the "To Do" list: stop by my agency to pick up my pay check, stop by the bank , grocery shop, buy a vacuum cleaner, do cam shows, work on my website more, re-shoot and edit the video intro for my website, re-work the layout for the front page of my site.

Later in the week I will FINALLY be able to upload the new media to Club Monica.