Friday, December 18, 2009

I've been having very unusual, but inspiring dreams lately. Since I was a child I've generally had very active dreams (so vivid in fact, sometimes I wake up feeling like I never went to slept), most likely because I have a very active mind, but I kind of like it, because often my dreams are the root of some of my best ideas.

This was the case the night before last. I had a dream about going on a hike in a really beautiful nature preserve/park. When I woke up I felt compelled to get out into nature. Not just compelled - more like something was calling me and not giving me much of an option to refuse. I'd heard that close to where I live is a state park called Runyon Canyon. I hadn't been there before but I looked it up online, and learned that the park is not even 5 mins from where I live. PERFECT!

It was about 8am, so I threw on some shorts, a shirt, sneakers, a cap and shades - jumped in the car and drove on over. Going on a hike yesterday morning was probably one of the best things I have done for myself in quite some time. It was an absolutely beautiful morning.

I took the intermediate trail - I actually wish I had brought my camera - next time I go I will and I'll take some shots and/or some video to share with you readers out there. For those of you who aren't aware, Runyon Canyon is a very hilly/mountainous park in LA. The scenery the park offers is pretty much what convinced me to move to to California. There are awesome scenic views of downtown LA, the Hollywood Sign, the million dollar homes in the area, the bay, etc.

Hiking trails like this one really help you get out of your head, and away from your ego. Hiking up a mountain and looking at the world from an elevated perspective really does allow you to look at the world and your immediate life a bit differently. Everyone in Los Angeles should be required to do this from time to time. I think it would cut down on the aggressive attitudes, superficiality and the crime.

I wound up picking up a hiking buddy for the morning along the way which was cool and made the walk down the mountain all the more interesting and enjoyable. He was an older tall man with white hair who you could tell got out into nature as much as possible. He turned out to be an airline pilot and a father who said he had a couple kids in their early 20's "around my age" (I did not correct him on that, I needed the ego boost - lol) and he gave me a lot of advice as to how even though people out in Los Angeles can be a bit "off kilter", you just have to forge your own path and keep moving forward and up. Usually I'm not overly social or friendly with strangers, but yesterday was a different kind of day. Plus I think this man just needed to get some stuff off his chest and it was fun to listen. It was nice to be back in the "natural world" and to have a conversation with someone about life - a convo that has nothing to do with money, sex, or anything else manipulative that in the end isn't that important.

Right now I'm actively working on changing my life for the better. I'm building my Monica Foster brand, taking strides towards opening my media studio, entering the field of health and wellness, getting my body healthy and strong and rebuilding my personal self view and self worth. Achieving all of these goals will be difficult but I welcome and really enjoy the challenge.

You know, last week I really was knocked down hard and wasn't sure that I was going to be able to get up. I almost didn't. I fell into a very deep depression. I was lied to, betrayed and hurt by someone that had no reason to do so and that I totally trusted. I suppose I'll never know the person's true motivations behind the lies and deceit. I probably don't need to know.

Last week's events I believe actually were a necessary part of my personal spiritual growth path when I really think about it. The events kicked my ass into full throttle, and shed light onto the reality of my interaction with that particular person. I now know what a truly selfish and self serving personality is, I and will be able to more easily identify such traits in others in the future.

Even though I was down in a dark pit of hurt, anger, loneliness and bewilderment that I wasn't sure I could get out of, I got my ass up and climbed out. I decided to myself that I had to learn from this BS, survive and go on, so I did.

Now I'm a much stronger, wiser and even more driven person. I'm still working my way through some negative residual emotions, but I'm just a few steps away from the light at the end of the tunnel (or maybe the top of the runyon canyon mountain - lol). I seriously dare anyone to even attempt to try to knock me down again, because by the time I'm only halfway done getting my life where I want it to be, which will be soon - I'll be able to knock the living hell out of just about anyone who attempts to cross my path with negative intentions again.