Today's just a quiet Saturday which is nice. Nothing much to blog about with the exception of I'll be on webcam the rest of the weekend.

Check out this video - it's a nice example of how everyone has a gift (and sometimes a very unexpected one), regardless of who they are or where they are in life.

I had a really good "date night" last night (yes, I am still single BUT I am back to dating - a girl's gotta get out!). One thing I'll say about Los Angeles, is that if a night out, especially a date, if planned properly (and even if it's just loosely planned), really can feel straight out of a romantic movie or a show like MTV's "The Hills" or "The City" (I'll admit it, I LOVE and am ADDICTED to both of these shows - I watch them online).

California restaurants and night spots take it to the next level when it comes to the decor and the atmospheres that the venues seem to go out of their way to create. Even chains like The Cheesecake Factory step it up a notch out here in LA opposed to Fort Lauderdale.

I've been writing quite a bit lately about the transitions I've gone through since moving out here to LA. Along with going through a lot of life changes, I've also started to come to MANY self realizations.

I've found that I haven't been 100% honest (only about 50%) with myself about what I really want, how I want to be treated and what I am willing and not willing to put up with in relationships. I suppose that many women do that because the media is constantly saying that you have to "compromise" on so many levels when it comes to maintaining a relationship - especially a romantic one. Well I've finally figured out that if you find yourself compromising to a level of which you're totally always biting your tongue and trying to "wait it out", then whoever you are with is definitely not for you.

I'm going do a lot of soul work to get to that 100%.

My advice to anyone today: No matter what - in a relationship always say what's on your mind and always be yourself - no matter how crazy or psychotic you are cause the right person for you will never think negatively when it comes to anything about you. Don't worry about trying to adjust your personality in an effort to make them like you more, because if you feel like they don't like you enough to begin with, then you shouldn't bother with them anyways. The right person for you will go to great lengths to ensure that you feel great.

In other news, I'll be working on webcam all weekend and will probably be helping a girlfriend of mine plan a cool house warming party since she just moved into a new apartment. I LOVE party planning :)

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Well, I woke up this morning and found the my website www.MonicaF.com was DOWN! My website has been online nearly seamlessly for quite a few years now but ALL OF A SUDDEN after I launch GettingIntoPorn.com which is on the same hosting server, my site has issues. Interesting (could be the huge amount of traffic - over 2,000 hits last night alone, that the website launch has generated of course but I'm not so certain).

Along with that my wireless router had issues as well (which I fixed). I truly hope no one out there is targeting my home network and websites, but I wouldn't be surprised considering the nature of some of the information I released on GettingIntoPorn.com - I will probably have to find alternate hosting for my websites and up my network security if the issues continue and are not resolved today.

In other news, I've been receiving a ton of positive feedback on my GettingIntoPorn.com and I'm very glad - the feedback alone was well worth all the effort.

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Well, it looks as though GettingIntoPorn.com will definitely be launched July 4th of 2009! I've been awake all night and neglecting my webcam show friends (I'm very sorry about the lack of private cam shows over the past few days but I'll be back in full force this weekend), to make sure everything is up and running just as it should be on www.gettingintoporn.com - I've created a supplemental blog for the site as well, so if you enjoy this blog, you will enjoy http://gettingintoporn.blogspot.com as well.

As of this morning about half the information is up and online but I still am in the process of editing and re-writing (I over do it) some of the information for the subsections of the site AND I still need to edit and possibly re-record some of my video commentaries.

Considering the current restructuring of the porn industry and the state of the economy (more women are turning to the porn and adult industry as a source of income than ever - check this article on MSNBC), I feel that getting this information out if very important.

You know, it's funny, because around when I first was beginning to shoot porn scenes, I shot for one woman in particular who I was really excited about meeting, but whom I received the impression did not like me one bit. I told this woman about how I was planning on putting together GettingIntoPorn.com and she clearly felt that I couldn't possibly know what I was talking about due to:

1) my experience in the industry not paralleling her own

2) her experience in the industry being far more lengthy than mine

3) her possible loss in faith in any of her peers in the industry (it can easily happen)

Well, I definitely am far from knowing everything about porn, but I'm extraordinarily observant, and I feel that one of my "talents" is that I'm able to see beyond the surface (though I might not always let on that I do), and piece together pieces of a puzzle very well.

This particular woman is someone I'd still like to get to know a bit more on some level oneday, I thought she was very interesting and I think that through her experiences she could do a lot for other women who may take a path similar to her own.

Next on the agenda for July will be to start doing a broadcast of RedTback.com weekly, possibly create a weekly broadcast for GettingIntoPorn.com, begin work on a sister site to GettingIntoPorn.com which will be GettingOutOfPorn.com , begin work on my newest project PornWorthWatching.com and start my newest service for porn performers on a budget who want a website XXXsimplesites.com

I own quite a few domain names that I need to figure out what to do with. For example, I registered www.porninthemainstream.com a while back mainly because I've begun to notice more and more pornstars crossing into not just mainstream entertainment but into all sorts of other professions WITHOUT feeling the need to hide their "porn past". I think that's kind of cool, so it'll probably be some sort of a simple site that I develop that centers around that trend/phenomenon.

I obviously have no life and am obsessed with porn as of current. Considering my most recent chain of events in my personal life, keeping myself busy is probably the best thing. My computer and projects have become my "boyfriend" again since obviously no human I come into contact deems me worthy of spending a vast amount of quality time on and giving their love to. Ugh - depressing.

On a side note, it looks like my friends who run harleysxxxtv will be launching a radio show and altering the direction of their site just a bit. I think that's great that they're moving along and not giving up.

It's about 7:14am and generally the only time I witness this particular time of day is if I stay up all night - not the case right now so I will be going back to bed soon.

I just felt the need to blog the following:

Along with not drinking and driving, make sure you don't drink and call people either.

Found this clip from Erotica LA online today, definitely cheered me up.

So it's a new month - July. This time last year I was selling or giving away everything that wouldn't fit in my SUV for my move across country, from sunny yet RAINY Fort Lauderdale, to sunny yet DRY Los Angeles California. It's just amazing as to how much can happen just within a year.

This time last year I was trying to figure out my place in this crazy industry dubbed as the "porn biz". This time this year I'm about to launch www.GettingIntoPorn.com .

This time last year I was just starting to really fall for my now ex boyfriend. This time this year I'm just starting to get over my now ex boyfriend. As a side note, I'm finding the end of this particular relationship surprisingly easy to come to terms with - primarily because in the end, I realized that it might not have ever really began. It amazes me how easily some individuals are just willing to "fall into situations" and not take the initiative to change or end things when it's not something that's necessarily right for them. That lazy mentality I think is more of a west coast male thing than anything else. I've found many California men (even at 40) never truly mature (or maybe I just have expectations that are way too high, who knows), and that being the case - may God never stop the constant migration of naive 20 something year actress hopefulls to Hollywood.

Ok Ok , that last comment was in anger. I suppose the truly hardest thing about trying to move on is that even if the boyfriend/girlfriend relationship thing wasn't working out you really miss your ex's company. The only problem is when you don't make a clean break, it can hinder your ability to 1) learn and grow and 2) re open the door to a potentially healthier situation. ARG!!!!! I hate emotions at times.

On the lighter side, this time last year I was worried about how I'd find hair extensions of same quality and cost that I purchased regularly back in Fort Lauderdale. This time this year I have a hot, sassy self done new hair cut and style that I love so much that I will most likely never wear extensions again (well I may, just not now) :)

This move out to Los Angeles (and this year in particular) has probably been one of the best experiences of my life in regards to self development. I feel a lot more confident, self reliant, independent, strong and beautiful. I felt many of those qualities prior to the move, but on a completely different level than as of current.
I've also learned a tremendous amount about what it is to develop a personal "network" - not just of friends, but acquaintances, and business contacts as well.
As I type this, I'm thinking about what I need to pick up from the grocery store today. Aside from doing laundry, going to the grocery store is one of my most hated of "chores". I never know what I'm going to want to realistically have to eat later and even though I make a list, I always wind up forgetting something.

I find I'm like that with many things in life. I take so much time to prepare and I try so hard to make sure all my basis are covered in whatever it is that I do that I often always wind up overlooking something that should be in "plain view". I am like that with site development, planning trips, and (though I hate to admit it) relationships. I will be working on that fault of mine in a major way.

Today is going to probably be just a basic day. Webcamming, working on my websites, and organizing a few things here and there in between my webcamming and site development.

I'm going to try to do a broadcast of RedTback tomorrow. I've been severely neglecting that site due to my work on GettingIntoPorn.com but I'm finally stablizing between all my projects so I have the time. Actually my newest project will be an adult movie review site I'm developing called PornWorthWatching.com - I have a feeling it will be a lot of fun to work on.

On a side note, I'm contemplating a change of scenery next year to Las Vegas - we'll see. Ultimately I will be settling and retiring in California but a quick move to Vegas for a couple of years would help me to save a good chunk of change and the Veas scene would be great socially.

For those of u who care, the intro video for GettingIntoPorn.com is online - it's not the best video intro but I tried - check out my new hairdo as well. The hair is probably my favorite part of the entire video :) The rest of the site will be online July 4th, 2009 - I felt it was an appropriate launch date for such a site.

I'm single again, but before I get to that let me backtrack:

I've probably been overworking myself over the past week or so. Why? Because the only thing I want in life is to find success on some level and in some capacity. I don't feel I've found it or achieved it yet, but I have faith that eventually I will.

I'm going to slow it down to a few notches above a comfortable pace though due to the advice of Miss Christy Canyon who I had the pleasure of meeting Friday afternoon when I had the opportunity to meet her and be a guest on Playboy Radio's "Night Calls" on Sirus Radio.

I have a lot of admiration for her being that she's braved the porn world, survived and has found a place to continue within the adult industry outside of performing. I'm not sure how the interview came across (I always am such an anxious and nervous wreck when I'm out of my element aka my apartment), but regardless I had a good time.

I thought her insight and comments were interesting - particularly when I mentioned how prior to getting into porn I was naive enough to believe the "Jenna Jameson - E True Hollywood Story" - I actually do still believe that documentary which airs on the E-channel every now and then because it is true - it is true for Jenna, just not for every woman who gets into the porn industry.

I suppose the reason I felt her comments were interesting was because she touched on how women who feel that embarking into the porn industry can ultimately find success in the mainstream entertainment world. Well evidently a very few select few can but it's a long shot. Jenna did - everyone in "mainstream world" most likely first thinks of "Jenna Jameson" when they think of porn, and I hate to say this, but Christy Canyon - hosting a show on Playboy Radio does indeed mean that you have achieved mainstream status. I'm proud of you and you are an excellent role model for a woman like myself.

I haven't touched on this due to my innate sadness, but I'll just type a quick comment on Michael Jackson's passing on:

I am very saddened by it, but I'm also OK with it, because I don't feel death is the end. We're not meant to be on earth forever - it's just a spiritual phase from my perspective. Many have said that he died without him fully rectifying himself. Big deal - MANY of the greatest entertainers and people and people have died in what superficially weren't the best circumstances in relation to the mark they've made - Elvis Presley, Josephine Baker, Mozart, Jesus Christ, etc (all of which I admire but aren't from my generation as Michael Jackson & Farah Fawcett, who coincidentally died on the same day, have been). It's the nature of artists and the greatest influentially people. They're put here to make a mark on and change our society, their craft, and the world. I have a feeling the Michael Jackson's spirit is continuing and rocking on, on a great path, a path that we as humans can't even imagine or wrap our minds around, and he's survived by his offspring. It's OK.

I was a huge MJ fan - not his number 1 fan I'm sure, I never wrote him a fan letter and I never had the chance to meet him in person (though I'd have liked to), but his music and being definitely shaped who I am today.

I had to let go of someone I deeply love today. Being that he didn't put up much of a fight I know it was the right thing to do. I will miss him more than I miss Florida, more than I miss my childhood bedroom, more than I miss most things and people I no longer have or have contact with. Maybe we'll be friends, maybe we won't. I don't know... All I know is that he is the best man I've known as of yet aside from my father.

You know the saying that goes something like:
"When you love something (or someone) you should let it (or them) go and if it (of they) stays it's (or they are) yours, if it (or that person) goes, it (or they) were never yours to begin with."

It's a hurtful experience, that's for sure, but it's all part of growing, evolving and ultimately LIVING.

This has been one hell of year, not just for me, but for everyone in the country and on earth. The great thing about time, is that it never stops. That's why I don't either - well I suppose I should really say that I never give up on my dreams - makes me a silly, overly romantic and overly idealistic woman, but hey, we all have faults.

I suppose the point of experiencing life and time is to do something positive and productive with it and ENJOYING it rather than wasting it and letting it go without doing a damn thing.

So I'm single again - DAMN. I'm not even going to know what to do with myself... Here's 2 videos. The first by Vinen and the 2nd by Trina (another South Florida black girl) - they don't exactly define my feelings but what hell - they're appropriate:

I will probably be uploading the framework to www.GettingIntoPorn.com tomorrow afternoon. All of the links will not be active yet, but the site should be about complete (FINALLY) by the end of the month. The site's purpose isn't to encourage or discourage anyone to take the path into the world of porn performance - it's simply a FREE resource to educate individuals (primarily women) looking to get their start in porn as a performer and to act as a central hub for all the adult industry info a person could possibly need before "getting into porn".

I remember when I first was looking for info on the porn industry I found only a few adult industry "behind the scenes" news resources and only a few adult industry forums. I scoured sites like AVN and Xbiz and checked a few adult industry blogs but I wasn't able to find the type of info that I know as of current and am putting together on GettingIntoPorn.com - I really wish I'd have been able to find a resource like I'm putting together prior to my start in the biz.

I'll tell you, one of the best adult industry resources I've viewed (actually after I'd begun shooting scenes) were the "Porn 101" and "Porn 102" videos which are available on the AIM website. The videos tell women (and men) looking to get into porn a lot of valuable info, but truthfully at this point AIM needs to step it up and produce a "Porn 103" video because there's quite a bit of info that hasn't been touched on in the current videos.

Speaking of AIM needing to "step it up", at this point considering everything that we know scientifically about HIV and the incubation period, WHY is the quarantine period for adult industry talents who have had sexual contact with other talents who then test HIV positive only a period of about a month (28 days I believe) rather than 3 to 6 months? According to ABOUT.com and many other resources such as STDresource.com, the facts of HIV the incubation period can be about 3 to 6 months (if not longer) where as an infected person can test negative but still be a carrier for all of that time? I think that since AIM's mission is to protect adult industry performers, they need to increase this quarantine window and possibly set up an offshoot organization that employs individuals in quarantine so that they can get by financially while they wait to find out their STD status.

Being that AIM is currently the primary testing facility for the Porn community,and being that the name's of the individuals currently in quarantine aren't public knowledge (the only individual I know of who's come out about his involvement is Seth Dickens and apparently if he tests negative he's looking to get back to performing ASAP according to his statement) there's no way at all that I could possibly in my right mind work as a talent in the next few months - too much of the equivalent of walking in the dark through a live landmine.

I actually don't see how ANY talent is comfortable shooting scenes at present with the lack of public information as to this current HIV issue in the porn industry. I'll go out on a limb here and state that most likely the only reason any talents are continuing to perform right now is because they:

1) haven't been told what is currently going on
2) haven't been educated as to how each individual in porn is only 2 to 3 degrees of seperation from one another.
3) aren't aware as to how the incubation period of HIV is 3 to 6 months

I understand that performing in a porn IS a risk, and that taking the risks of getting an STD is a part of the business, but considering what's happening right now with this HIV issue (which is obviously very serious considering that in LA county the public health department is offering FREE HIV testing till Saturday in various locations), all of this "mess" could be avoided if condoms were used more regularly in scenes. When I perform in the future, condom use will definitely be something that will be in place.

Tomorrow will be an interesting afternoon. I'm booked to be on Playboy Radio's "Night Calls", hopefully I won't be too nervous and will lots to discuss with the shows hosts and callers :)

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Well I had a fun night last night - it was a good friend of mine's birthday party and a welcome diversion from the stress and anxiety of the week. I'm very fortunate to have made friends out here in LA that are far removed from the adult entertainment industry. Keeps me halfway down to earth and at least one quarter of the way based in "reality".
Everytime I hang out with this particular friend of mine, who is naturally very musical, she inspires me to keep practicing on my guitar. I play a bit of piano but guitar has been a bit of a challenge - what I love most about the instrument though is that it's easily portable and a great ice breaker and way to bring people together - oh and of course, I love the sound - an acoustic guitar even if played badly never actually sounds that bad :)
Today I spent some time organizing some paperwork, doing laundry and just resting (oh yea, my life is so exciting and sexy - not). I'll be on webcam tonight and most of tomorrow - oh come to think of it tomorrow afternoon will be another busy day as I'm helping a friend of mine move into her new apartment. I never have an issue with helping a friend move because considering all the moving I've had to do solo in the past, I'd do anything to help any of my friends avoid the stress and physical hardship (especially when stairs are involved).

It's been a while since my last post, but due to this week being pretty uneventful and mellow, there hasn't been too much reason to write.

Last weekend was Erotica-LA, and being that it was my first adult industry convention ever (I've never even attended a convention as a patron before), I feel that my experience there was very good and completely free of drama. Below are some photos of me at the HarleysXXXtv booth.






I really enjoyed meeting some of my website's Club Monica members and it felt good to have people request my autograph and to have their photo taken with me. Yes, I have realized that I am indeed a bit of an "attention whore", but I have it under control :) Plus I believe that everyone should have that "hey look at me, I'm so great" experience at least once in their life.

This week is just all about webcam shows, but next week it looks like I have a couple non-adult acting gigs so that should be interesting. I'm anticipating that by August I'll be beginning shooting on my first adult video project as a writer/director so stay tuned :)

Tomorrow (well more like today being that it's already past midnight) I'll be at my first adult industry convention/expo Erotica-LA . I've been pretty busy over the past few days getting ready for the event. If you'd like a bit of a visual as far as how thorough and amazingly anal I am when it comes to getting ready for any (what I consider major) event just think back to that Reese Witherspoon movie "Election", when Reese's character wakes up at around 4am to make cupcakes, posters, etc for the first day of campaigning for her class's student government election - I say that half in jest and half in dead seriousness.

Over the past few days I've been printing labels and creating the media content for my Exclusive Limited Edition Monica Foster CD ROM business cards, putting my outfits together for the convention and the Harleys XXX TV Post Erotica LA after party, I redid my hair extentions, sent out my press releases, posted my appearance info and schedule on my website and myspace pages, picked up my porn DVDs to sell and sign, promoted my appearance at the Erotica LA event on my webcam shows, and the list goes on and on.

Contract stars and other big adult industry names have a guy or team of people to do all of this for them...I on the other hand have to do it all myself. It's rewarding, yet stressful and tiring.

Tomorrow in the morning I still have to stop at CVS to pick up a few things and then find my way to the convention center. Thank god for GPS. However once I arrive I have to check in and find my way to the booth I'll be signing in. I suppose the best part of the day will be to finally get a chance to say "hello" to my friends and fans and thank them for taking the time to watch me.

Oh, below is a pic of the CD cards I made. This is just a sample one - the actual ones have a login and password for a 3 month membership to my website (50 of them) which come to think of it, I still need to enter into the admin area of my website. The work never ends...

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Just a note to let you all know I'll be on webcam the entire weekend and on niteflirt I'm running a weekend $1.99 per min special - usually the price is between $2.99 and $3.99 so here's your chance to see me at an economy friendly rate!

Today I was browsing the internet checking out other new "interracial porn" releases and and something suddenly hit me - maybe I was simply enlightened - who knows, but here was my thought:

Considering the day and age we live in and the amazing progress that America (and the english speaking world for the matter) has made over the past 200 years or so, and our current political leader especially, the country needs to end the "racial classification" system at this point once and for all and we all just need to be Americans. The term "interracial" is stupid at this point - we're all fucking human.

When you go to France, everyone there is "French" , when you go to Brazil, everyone there is Brazilian (and please keep in mind that a Brazilian can have blond hair and blue eyes or be as black as I am) so what the hell is America's problem? What the hell is the porn industry's problem with their constant attempt to fetishize people with different skin tones having sex? It's STUPID. I actually hate to say it but "Not the Cosbys XXX" raunchily but clearly illustrates that yes, ALL people of all shades AND cultural economic backgrounds CAN and WILL and DO have sex at some point and it doesn't have to be via stereotypical scenereos.

What EXACTLY dictates someone being black or white or whatever now days anyways? Take a look at the photo below: those 2 kids come from the same parents but one is darker than the other, are you gonna tell me that they some how are not equal? If you didn't know what their parents looked like how would YOU classify these kids? COULD you classify them?



How in the hell can someone be LATIN with latin is a language base? Why are all asians lumped together when there's such a wide spectrum of people from the asiatic area of the world?

I'll tell you this, the very SECOND that extraterrestrial contact is made, no one will be black, white, yellow, red, or whatever anymore - we'll all be earthlings so listen up readers of this blog - get with the times now and stop buying racial specific porn. Stop checking a box as to what race you are on forms.

Upon entering the porn biz I was all hung up on being a "black girl" in porn - why? Because the idiots who run the show want to put me in the "black girl box". Why are girls like Misty Stone and Cassidy Clay who in my opinion both appear MULTIRACIAL boxed into being "black girls". Why are girls like Shay Jordan (aka Jannine Jinn) and Tera Patrick NOT classified as being "ethnic" when they're clearly not primarily "european". Why does DJ Snoop have to be a "black" performer when he's clearly multi-ethnic? It's so rediculous at this point.

The REAL problem with porn right now is that it's so stuck in the "old mindset" - the only progress that I and some others I frequently speak to in the biz see is the return of HUMOR into this business via this new flood of parodies. Someone very close to me recently told me that when he first began working in the biz it was a lot more fun and there was a lot more humor. Humor is the basis of positivity in my opinion - if you can't smile and laugh there's no point in living. I think when a lot of pornographers who are just based in negativity and evil started producing SHIT that degrades and in many cases HURTS women, it probably brought a shit load of negative and bad kharma into the industry which is why it's having a hard time economically right now.

Here's my suggestion to pornographers: Cut the crap. Stop the shitty gonzo. Stop with the "black porn, white porn, latin porn, asian porn and interracial porn" generas. Big porn companies, don't be afraid of throwing a brown face in your productions - when you don't it's VERY obvious. Start classifying porn as to it's content and not the COLOR of the actors - oh and by the way - put some fucking EFFORT into your productions for once. Just cause you have a high def camera and decent editing does NOT mean that your porn is good. Write a god damn storyline and make it GOOD - it's really NOT that difficult.

I will be starting a porn movie review site soon and I am going to REALLY review these flicks that are supposedly OH SO GREAT, cause guess what - most of them ain't.

Here's an interesting article I found today called "Dating 101: Dealing With the Race Factor - what's wrong with mixing?"- definitely worth a read.

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Not too much to report in regards to the weekend - just have been VERY busy with my private webcam shows and website projects - which is a great thing :)

This Tuesday (June 2nd), my first adult feature movie, "Not the Cosby Show XXX", will finally be released. I'm pretty interested in how the flick will be received. I have a feeling some will be "insulted" while others will "get it" - all depends on the viewer's IQ level I suppose.

You can pre-order a copy from Adult DVD Universe by clicking the boxcover below, OR you can request an Autographed Copy from me for $40 by clicking here :)

It's been a few days since I've last blogged so here's an update.

My Memorial Day weekend was fantastic. I headed up to the Lake Nacimiento area to camp for 3 days with my boyfriend and another friend and had a BLAST. I haven't camped since I was a little girl in GirlScouts and truthfully, I'd forgotten how much I enjoying being out in nature.

The drive up to the lake definitely showcases California's variety in it's landscape - on the approach you feel as though you're in Tuscany as you drive through California's wine country. The area we camped in was absolutely beautiful. Clear skies, clear warm lake water which was PERFECT for swimming and beautiful day and evening weather. I've made the firm decision that the area we camped in is the place I'd like to live permanently the moment I can afford to.

I'll post some photos and video from the trip a little later tonight or tomorrow.

It's been a pretty uneventful week so far and I like it this way. Oh, before I forget last night I had a chance to go by the RudeTV studios and be a guest on Ginger Lynn's show "Dirty Diva's" - if you missed the live broadcast you can watch the archive here:

http://www.rude.com/tv/archive/id/86222

Next week I have quite a bit to do so I'll just sit back for now, enjoy chatting on my webcam and chill :)

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Well, here's an interesting piece of news for those of you out there (like myself) who don't have a TV and therefor are clueless as to the up to date happenings of today's pop culture. It looks like Playboy has crowned it's 50th Anniversary 2009 Playmate of the year, and though they try to soften the facts to make her more "acceptable" to America by noting her ethnicity as her father being Swedish and her mother being a native of Tanzania, the Playmate of the year, Ida Ljungquist, this year is a BLACK GIRL! I am shocked, but then again, maybe I'm not considering that Playboy has always kept up with the political pace. I suppose that Hef thought to himself "Hmmm, well the President of the USA is half white and half African so I suppose I should make the 50th anniversary Playmate something of the like".



I'm very happy for this girl, but I will openly admit, that I am very very very jealous. For doing ONE nude pictorial and possibly Hef, she received $100,000, a new Mazda 6, and a bottle of Patron. I'd settle just for the car and the Patron. Supposedly she was discovered on Rodeo drive in a Bebe store. WTF - I and other women bust their asses in the adult world and get paid chump-change and all this girl has to do is hang out at a mall and she hits the big time? I can't even afford to SHOP at the mall. Either her "discovery" story is fake or she's just got the luck of the Irish - or maybe the Swedish?

Anyways today was relatively uninteresting. I got a call from someone who supposedly has connections for adult print work - I could barely hear the cat on the phone and he didn't give a last name - then he said he'd call me back in 5 mins and never did. Typical industry flakes and weirdos. Then I logged in for webcam shows. Then I logged out. Then I trimmed my hair a little more, and then logged back in for camshows. That was my Sunday - whoopee.

I've gotta figure out how I can get it together financially, it's ridiculous at this point. Someone close to me recently said something to me along the lines of if you don't have it together by 30, then you probably never will. That made me feel really bad because I'm 30 and I definitely don't have it together yet. I don't know if I ever will. To all my blog readers who are parents out there: PLEASE teach your kids at a young age about money, credit, business, etc - my parents are great but money is something that they never educated me about and I think that's why it's always been my biggest problem and issue.

I decided today, that if I am not on solid ground money wise by December, I'm moving out of Los Angeles area. If I can't cut it here, then that's just how it is. Just another lesson learned.



Oh, before I forget, I will be working a booth and "signing" (though I don't know what the hell I'm gonna sign or if anyone would even WANT me to sign anything for them) at Erotica-LA. So if you're in the area, come on by. Debating whether to sport my new short hair look for the event or to throw some extensions back in - we'll see.

I recently came across a porn from Elegant Angel I will definitely have to watch. It's called "Busty Cops on Patrol" - it looks funny as hell (a cross between Cops and Reno 911)), and probably has some killer sex scenes in it as well considering the cast - 2 of my favorite female adult stars are in it in fact: Jada Fire and Shyla Styles). I love the work this studio puts out - I always wanted to be in one of their movies but alas, they've never called to book me. Check out the trailer here.

Well it's about 3:20am and technically Monday, so I'm going to end this cynical blog and get back to my webcam. Later this morning I may reward myself with a swim, there's few things more calming than floating in a pool and looking at the sky.

My encouragement, motivation and inspiration in regards to my adult industry "career" came from a very unlikely source today - my Mother.



My Mom and I are a lot more alike than I generally admit to. I suppose it's because many of the qualities I embody which my Mother and I have "butted heads" about over the years, ironically are the same qualities she embodies as well - and you know what they say: sometimes looking in the mirror is one of the most difficult things to do.

Today I made my traditional weekend call to my mom and she asked me as usual "what's new". In the past I always maneuvered the conversations with my Mother away from myself being that I haven't always been comfortable talking to my mom about working in the adult industry, but as time has passed (especially this and last year), that discomfort has eased and I can speak very openly with all my family about what I have done and do for a living (and being able to be open with my mother, father and rest of the family about my life choices is probably one of the best gifts life has given me).

Anyways I decided to give my mom the complete story as to the release of my first adult feature "Not the Cosby Show XXX" since the release date is only a few weeks away. I conveyed to her that I'm very excited about the release because 1) It's the first and only feature I've ever performed in, 2) It's a bit of a personal movie for me because I had to draw from some very personal experiences in life and face some personal demons in order to get through it acting wise, 3) It's one of the first heavily anticipated adult feature movies that showcases a primarily African-American cast and 4) It will probably help in my website and webcam show sales.



So after a long conversation I told my mom that I'm about done doing adult work with the exception of content for my website and I told her that it's primarily due to my not feeling like I really have a shot at being the "porn star" that I wanted to be due to racial hurdles, the fact that I'm already 30, and the fact that I have really limited "connections". I explained to her about the success of some of the more celebrated "stars" in porn and I told her that I just don't think I'm cut out to be one of those women.

Well, my mom (of all people) said "Why not? Why can't you be a porn superstar like those other women?". Yep. My mom, of all the people in the world, gave me the encouragement today to stop focusing on the negatives and get up, dust myself off, and (yes I am going to say it) - get back on the PORN horse.

Why should I limit myself to only producing content for my website? Why should I listen to "industry professionals" who have said I don't have the personality or looks to be a porn superstar. Why should I listen to the asshole sitting behind a desk at a porn studio who says "gosh, why bother getting into the industry at 30"? Why should I pay ANY attention to the shit that jealous and hateful and spiteful bitches and bastards write about me on adult industry forums? Fuck all that. Why should I be toss away the past year, and struggle while training for massage therapy, when I have - and come June - WILL HAVE a ton of new opportunities presented to me via the release of my first adult feature?

Now don't get me wrong, my Mom's not encouraging me or influencing me to specifically be a pornstar, or to go into any particular occupation for that matter. She's simply the type of person who (like myself) believes that you need to follow your dreams (no matter how crazy or unrealistic they may be) and that once you start something, you should finish it.

So, in conclusion come June, I will most likely be back to shooting some hot porn scenes for both my website AND other studios (God & economy willingly). I'm looking forward to it, and hopefully my agency Type9models will be as well, as if I do get back in the game, I'm planning on making myself and them a good chunk of change so that I can achieve everything in life I've set out to do, from directing my own adult content, to opening a studio to produce high end mainstream media and adult ethnic media/content, and then to one day running my own spa retreat.

I'm still going to be doing my massage therapy training as well (because for whatever reason I am into wellness and healing and massage therapy does tie in with one of my future goals), but I'm following my mom's advice and am going to try my best to get back in the game in a major way, so Monica Foster fans out there - get ready to see a bit of a different Monica than you've seen up to the present. After all "Why not?".

A big thank you to my Mom and Dad. I'm a very lucky girl to have the support of my family and close friends. I've come to learn, not too many people do. Moving from Florida to California alone has been THE most difficult thing I've ever done in my life, and without my family and friend's support I don't think I'd still be pushing forward.

I'm the type of person who was raised to go above and beyond to be helpful and nice to others. As I've aged, and traveled through life's experiences, I've learned that being "nice and kind and helpful" is a good way to live and be - it creates a positive vibe in your surroundings, makes others around you feel good and generally putting out positivity allows life to reflect that positivity right back to you.

However unfortunately there are those in this world who are self serving PIGS who target those who want to do good, and attempt to take advantage of the "nice kind and helpful" people. The these assholes have the nerve to try to guilt trip "nice kind and helpful" people when such people finally have enough sense to see through their maniuplations.

I'm rambling about such PIG people today because I had to tell off someone with an ego the size of Texas today. Truthfully, it was very draining energy wise, but I'm glad I did because I'm very focused on being successful this year and I don't want anyone or anything weighing me down.

I hope my blog readers enjoy the above photo. It's from a set I took this afternoon. I love having short hair again. I will not be wearing a weave again for quite some time. Oh , and for all you fashionistas out there - the bikini? It's by: TARGET (12.99 for the top and 12.99 for the bottoms) - you can catch me in it this Memorial Day weekend.

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Today is a typical bright, sunny and low humidity Los Angeles day (and I'll tell you, it's SO motivational to wake up to so many days like this). I'll be doing webcam and website work until the late evening so I won't be actually going out to "enjoy the day", but it's nice to look at the window and know that it's THERE.

I spent a nice couple of hours by the pool yesterday after getting some website templates completed for a friend of mine's site I'm building. Then in the evening I was scheduled to participate in the "Not the Cosby's XXX" commentary along with Will Ryder (director), Misty Stone (Denise) and Thomas Ward (Cliff). It was good to see Will, Misty and Thomas again - I actually hadn't seen any of the cast in quite some time.

Though I'm not going to say much in this blog about the contents of the movie itself (as it should be a surprise), it is FANTASTIC! Everything in the movie is far above the typical "porn bar". From the truly comedic (and slightly ironic) writing, to the constancy with the era it is staged in, to the wardrobe and set design, to the video quality (composition and lighting), to the editing, to the casting, to the actual ACTING (Misty Stone, Thomas Ward, T-Reel, and Tyler Knight REALLY stand out), to the quality and energy of the sex scenes - EVERYTHING in this movie is great. I haven't seen EVERY porn spoof, but of all of the ones I've seen, this one is THE BEST. Oh, and I'm not just saying that because I'm in it - well - maybe I am - you'll have to buy it and see it for yourself :)

Not the Cosby's XXX is being touted as becoming the "most popular interracial sex movie ever". Well if so, that's great, because I'm beginning to wonder if interracial sex porns are a gauge as to how "America" views the acceptability of interracial relationships. Many people are unaware of this, but within the porn industry there is a certain "stigma" attached to a Caucasian performer, working with an African-American performer.

Many Caucasian women AND men in the business specifically request not to work in the "interracial market" and if you read some of the adult industry forums like www.xxxporntalk.com you'll start to see pretty quickly that many Caucasian performers, directors, studio owners, etc have a very negative view and outlook on African-Americans - I personally feel this mentiality has nothing to do with my ethnicity's "sexual or hygienic practices", but that this negative out lash has more to do with the attacker's feeling of self inadequacy.

It's actually very disappointing to learn that many agent's feel their Caucasian performer's value will "go down" by him or her working with African-Americans. I suppose this way of thinking has been a primary factor as to why I will be very rarely (if ever) shooting any adult scenes for any other website or DVD with the exceptions of those I put out independently.

I'm actually starting to wonder if race relations are truly getting better with time, or worse with time...especially in recent times. I have a friend on the east coast that I speak with regularly - she works as an exotic dancer. She's currently in NC and has had one hell of a time finding a club to work in. She's very attractive with a great body. Being that she's a chocolate brown African-American woman however, 3 of the major clubs in the area have turned her down for work. 1 club in particular had the hostess tell my friend that the manager wasn't available, but then when 2 more (Caucasian) girls came in to audition, he was magically available.

I suggested to my friend that she allow me to interview her for my website: www.redtback.com so that we can document the names of these clubs and her experiences. The adult entertainment loving public NEEDS TO KNOW.

The longer that I'm officially in the "porn business", the more I'm understanding why you don't have that many "upscale" or "non-ghetto" African-American women bothering with the business.

I was contacted recently by an "industry verteran" who inquired as to whether I would be interested in being booked for an hour long fetish shoot which would pay a rate that is FAR below even the "minimum" industry standard rates. I wrote back to this individual and explained that I would need a bit more money. This person BLASTED me with a reply/retort which ended in the typical phrase "I can get girls of your TYPE off the street all day for this money but I figured I'd offer the job to you". I say that this phrase is "typical", because I've heard it 3 times from various "established" yet broke porn directors (and I strongly suggest that no one buys the DVD series "Black Cheerleader Tryouts" because the director of this series has used this phrase with me).

I feel like this, if the clients of these directors and studio owners just want ANY black woman, then yea, PLEASE people, find a girl "off the street", but the truth is, that I, and other black women in this business who have made it into the "high-end" porns simply are NOT "street girls" , so yea, while the skin color may be the same as your 100 dollar whores, it's not really the skin color that your clients are after...

Anyways at present, I'm only taking on a few select adult projects that really appeal to me (am LOVING working with DT wrestling) and am producing original content for my own network of websites. I'm very happy with this choice and actually have decided to take Monica Foster into a bit more of a "softcore" and "mild erotic" arena.

The showtime audition I mentioned in a previous blog, I decided to cancel - after reading the script I realized right away that the part was not for me. Not only did the characted role not have a name other than "female worker" but it also had me acting in a way and saying things that I was ENTIRELY not comfortable with. Yes - acting is acting, but as I mature, I'm finding that only doing things in life that I REALLY feel good about doing and want to do is all that's important.

Well I've been on a solid camshow schedule for about a month now and I feel good about it. I like being on a routine. I'll be on cam a bit today and then later tonight so I'll see u all online!

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It's only about 3:45pm and I've already had a pretty full day. This morning I had 2 wrestling matches with a company I work with as a "sexy female wrestler" from time to time called DT Wrestling. Whew! Working with DT is a workout every time. I love these peeps.

Today my opponent was miss Akira - I'll post some photos of the match. Actually if any of you guys want to see me wrestle you can always request a custom match from the company featuring yours truly :)



Looks like the lil wayne music video I was in is out. I'm only in the video for about 1 second towards the end (pause the video at 4:33 and look at the bottom left of the screen - I'm wearing a pink, purple, black and white dress that ties at the neck and I'm dancing by the car). I'll take a screen shot of where I am and circle myself later :)

Lil Wayne Feat Young Money - Every Girl / NEW
by PeteRock

Looks like this Tuesday I have an audition for recurring character in a mainstream series set to air on the Showtime so wish me luck :)

Today at 2pm (PST) I had my 3rd weekly Club Monica members webcam show for the week (yep, Club Monica members get 3 free 1 hour shows a week!). After my nap I'll be on cam tonight to TTYL!